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ROBLOX Forum » Club Houses » Clans & Guilds
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Re: RSF- On broken glass.

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bardo is not online. bardo
Joined: 29 Aug 2008
Total Posts: 7427
23 Oct 2011 06:28 AM
CAPTER ONE.

BAUER: So you think this will work?

JamFromHell: Of course it would, I tested it out myself.

BAUER: I really don't think it's safe, and who did you test it out on?

FruitBox walks in and nods his head at Jam.

FB: Me, and it worked, Don't you see how much more stronger,skilled and smarter I am? Honestly BAUER. Anyway I have requested other Generals to come here to also test it out, i've also asked aidsfighter and bardo to come.

JamFromHell:Bardo is coming? I thought it was High ranks only.

FB: Bardo has proved his skill, loyalty and leadership to me many a time.
The doors burst open and the people who walks in are General 1Fire, Officer Aidsfighter and Captain bardo.

FB: Where are the rest of you?

Bardo:I'm sorry sir, there was an assult at Arvore and mostly everyone is dead, only a few soldiers survived and the High Ranks were gaged and captured.

Aidsfighter: We couldn't stop them, we failed you sir.

FB: Stop who?

1Fire: They almost killed us, we were cornered in and we are lucky to be alive.

FB:Who are they?

Bardo: They were coming in there thousands, we were so outnumbered!

FB: FOR GOD SAKE, WHO!?!?!

Bardo,Aidsfighter & 1Fire: NFC! WHO ELSE?!?!

FB: But we were not in a real war with them.

Bardo: Well we are now, the've just made it personal. Ready up, were going in.

BAUER,JamFromHell,Bardo,FruitBox,1Fire and Aidsfighter all got guns, ammo, grenades and swords, ready to take a last stand.

FB: Get the remaining Survivors and lets teach NFC a lesson.
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The13thHippie is not online. The13thHippie
Joined: 18 May 2010
Total Posts: 47856
23 Oct 2011 06:29 AM
Nice title. I like it.


[I do this "Mini-Modding" bit from time to time because the normal run-of-the-mill "Mini-Mods" just don't crush enough souls.]
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bardo is not online. bardo
Joined: 29 Aug 2008
Total Posts: 7427
23 Oct 2011 06:33 AM
Thanks, once I get enough veiws I will make Chapter 2.
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The13thHippie is not online. The13thHippie
Joined: 18 May 2010
Total Posts: 47856
23 Oct 2011 06:35 AM
I used to write group stories lol.

Then I lost my motive and kind of stopped.


[I do this "Mini-Modding" bit from time to time because the normal run-of-the-mill "Mini-Mods" just don't crush enough souls.]
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dylanm122 is not online. dylanm122
Joined: 28 Jan 2011
Total Posts: 110
23 Oct 2011 07:59 AM
Cool
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desertedbart is not online. desertedbart
Joined: 17 Dec 2010
Total Posts: 2258
23 Oct 2011 08:04 AM
cool.
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garybolt is not online. garybolt
Joined: 14 Nov 2010
Total Posts: 427
23 Oct 2011 08:37 AM
pure epicness :D
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FerrariLambo is not online. FerrariLambo
Joined: 21 Nov 2009
Total Posts: 1077
23 Oct 2011 10:48 AM
Ooh, Nice.
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mcaustin7817 is not online. mcaustin7817
Joined: 26 Sep 2011
Total Posts: 44
23 Oct 2011 01:30 PM
nfc stincks
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Mohamed2468 is not online. Mohamed2468
Joined: 12 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 234
25 Oct 2011 08:04 PM
Nice story bardo. Just make it a little longer and check your grammar. And add more details.
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FerrariLambo is not online. FerrariLambo
Joined: 21 Nov 2009
Total Posts: 1077
06 Nov 2011 12:33 PM
This is only 'CAPTER' 1! xD Lolz.
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pepsman is not online. pepsman
Joined: 29 Nov 2008
Total Posts: 152
08 Nov 2011 08:35 AM
@Mohamed, Says who..?
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Mohamed2468 is not online. Mohamed2468
Joined: 12 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 234
01 Feb 2012 05:09 PM
@pepsman: Says mah own mouth! It would just make the story a little more interesting you know. :)
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MahPizzaIsHere is not online. MahPizzaIsHere
Joined: 30 Apr 2011
Total Posts: 7707
01 Feb 2012 05:09 PM
Needs more treble, the bass is drowning it out.
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Zuesstormgod88 is not online. Zuesstormgod88
Joined: 19 Oct 2010
Total Posts: 7997
23 May 2013 05:51 PM
How odd. lol
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romuluz is not online. romuluz
Joined: 12 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 18124
23 May 2013 05:59 PM
Format is all wrong, there are practically no descriptives and why the whole super soldier bit and characters walking in with no seeming purpose?


This needs A LOT of work.
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Zuesstormgod88 is not online. Zuesstormgod88
Joined: 19 Oct 2010
Total Posts: 7997
23 May 2013 06:00 PM
>look at the post date
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ShadowSTR is not online. ShadowSTR
Joined: 08 Jul 2010
Total Posts: 24465
23 May 2013 06:00 PM
Heh.
The title refers to the state of rsf
How ironic
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