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Re: Productive and Helpful Trolling with Xilirite

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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 09:16 PM
Just because I want to archive these in some way, this is where I will put all the thrashings I give bad threads. If you haven't seen them before, I basically analyse, word by word, sentence by sentence, an entire thread's first post, and inject my own personal brand of humour into it.

First one, from "^-The Germ-^"

In this one, Evil Scientists turn Invader Zim into a Zombie Spam Bot with Voodoo Claws, while the Scientists all turn out to be in the heads of but one scientist, who dies and joins Invader Zim on his quest to become Nigerian Princes. Or something like that. It might have just been zombies. I start off commenting on his English skills, but quickly jump into my normal style.



"story line"

Nice capitalization there, buddy.

"In a lab About 2120 there was a Group of scientists."

Incorrect capitalization, lack of punctuation, wrong tense, and bland as hell.

"There In A clear white room only one door that is reinforced."

They're, not there. Also, again, lack of punctuation and incorrect capitalization.

"In the middle of the room the is a table with a dead corpse on It."

As opposed to a living corpse. Those are just the worst.

"There are 5 men in white lab coats surrounding it there face in intense consertraion"

Wow, I love Consertraion. It's my favorite thing to do!

"ON man is carefully hold the corpses mouth open with two metal sticks and the other is slowly pouring a green liquid in its mouth."

Ontario Man? Also, two metal sticks? Did they just find a pair of steel toothpicks or something? Also, I've given up on mentioning the fact that There only has one meaning, not 3.

"When there done pouring the corpse lets out a spamzim."

Spamzim?
Oh god. They're creating spam bots. Those MONSTERS!

"The doctors quickly back away but they go on ignoring what happened 4 hours later of hard work the day is over they go home."

What, you mean the trained doctors don't care that their cadaver just had a seizure? And they just go home?"

"The next day they come back to see a terafing sight"

Terafing? Tera-thing? Terra-fing? I'm guessing that they saw a thing from Tera and were like "Woah man, that game is awesome, right?"
(/has never played Tera)

"The corpse is alive dangling from the celling the head upside and the left eye dangling from its socket it opens it’s mouth to show 2 rows of razor sharp teeth its barley resizable as human."

Those poor scientists can even resize the zombie. Also, the corpse is alive and dangling from the ceiling? How? Did it just come to life and then hang himself?

"One of the doctors gets on his protection suit"

Protection Suit? Really? That is the single worst name for a Hazardous Materials Suit I've ever heard.

"and goes The Zim(what the doctors named it)"

God damn it, guys. First you cancel his show, then you turn him into a zombie/spam-bot hybrid? You guys suck.

"admentenly"

I can't even tell what word you're trying to spell here, that's how this is getting.

"jumps down from the ceiling slashing the doctor with its claws witch cut through the suit like its paper."

Yeah, because it's a HazMat suit, not freaking MJOLNIR. What did they expect? Also, why does it have claws that are also witches?

"He’s is dead instantly."

He's is dead? HE'S IS? Really now? He is is? Are you even past first grade? My six year old brother is better at writing than you!

"He suddenly starts to jerk and spaz then he slowly gets up eyes blood shot red"

I think blood shot red is redundant. Kind of like saying the Eagle of Flight.

"The Zims smash through the two feet reinforced metal walls"

TWO FOOT WALLS? You could fit people in those things, and you're telling me they just walk out? And what happened to the other 4 scientists? Did they just leave? Did they have a heart attack? Were the figments of the first scientist's imagination?

"and start run down the corridor on two feet at speeds of30Mph"

Run on two feet? What, do they just powerslide through the halls at 30 miles per hour (Which is faster then a lot of cars, you idiot. They'd probably get torn apart, moving at that speed all the time with their rotting limbs.

"The alarms go off but its already to late."

Both Invader Zim and the Scientist are Nigerian Princes, and tried for the rest of their lives to give their money away to all the poor internet citizens in the world. Everyone passed them off as spam emails. Eventually, they both died from old age in each other's arms. The End.
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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 09:19 PM
If you see any really bad RPs pop up that you think I could make a funny analysis on, please, do let me know.
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Riku1257 is not online. Riku1257
Joined: 15 Aug 2011
Total Posts: 10066
01 Jun 2012 09:21 PM
God, I have a million.
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CapRex213 is not online. CapRex213
Joined: 14 Mar 2009
Total Posts: 15981
01 Jun 2012 09:22 PM
BRILLIANCE.

IT HAS BEEN DETECTED.
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MrGiraffe1 is not online. MrGiraffe1
Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Total Posts: 23833
01 Jun 2012 09:28 PM
is it odd this reminds me of bad fan fiction friday

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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 09:34 PM
Another one. This one is from "thestoryof"

Oh dear god. In this one, we see a first grader live off the land and help random villagers after being given away by his parents to some guy they know for no reason who ended up dying, and is then attacked by Joe the Samurai because Joe isn't right in the head. It's all just exposition, too, so it makes me vomit.



"When yomin was 1,his parents gave him to their closest friend,Yuji,a samurai from the dimond clan."

Okay, wait, hold on. Let me just stop here for a sec before we continue, because a lot is going on. Who the hell is Yomin? Why do his parents hate him so much that they just give them to their buddy in the Faux-Diamond clan?

"When he was 4, a war started between good and evil itself."

Why is it always good and evil? Why not good and slightly less good? Or Morally Grey and Slightly Less Morally Grey, Drifting Slightly Towards Black?

"Yuji was killed by the demons."

What demons? How was he killed? Is this entire tale just clumsily executed exposition?

"From that day Yomin tried to forget as much as he could,but from that day,he remembers seeing the moon flash,as the arrow struck him."

How can he remember it if he's for? And why did the moon flash? And you can't just say him and he over and over again, because now, it appears to be the case that the arrow struck Yomin, and then Yuji was just like 'Crap, his parents will kill me if they find out. Better end it sooner rather then later!' and died.

"He stayed alone for 2 more years,living off nature,always trying to help when needed to those in trouble."

BUT HE'S SIX! HOW THE HELL CAN HE LIVE OFF NATURE AND HELP PEOPLE IF HE IS SIX?

"One day he ran into another samurai,Joe,who attacked him and almost brought him to his death."

Joe? Joe the Samurai saw a little kid, and the first thing thought that passed through his head was "KILL DESTROY DEATH MURDER"

"Yet he spared him,and he became Yomin's master."

Why did he spare him? Did he suddenly realise he was beating on a first grader? Why did he become the kid's master? EXPLAIN THESE THINGS!

"to be continued later--->"

Oh my god, I was right. The whole thing really IS just clumsily executed execution. My god.
My eyes aren't even bleeding, they're just blood now. Orbs of blood, that just keep spinning in circles. At least I get to save money on red paint, now.
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EnchantingShadows is not online. EnchantingShadows
Joined: 24 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 1325
01 Jun 2012 09:35 PM
[ Content Deleted ]
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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 09:35 PM
Poor CapRex sent me "thestoryof" after I already tore it apart. :P
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MrGiraffe1 is not online. MrGiraffe1
Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Total Posts: 23833
01 Jun 2012 09:36 PM
http://www.roblox.com/Forum/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=68065379
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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 09:49 PM
This one is from "< /3~School of Hunger~< /3"

In this one, I read the embodiment of cancer.



"(the broken hearts are because there hungry"

Because your Esophagus goes to your heart, not your stomach. That's why food can give you heart attacks!

"i made this for my friend btw xD)"

Jesus Christ, I'd hate to see what you do to your enemies...

"Its the 11th hunger games and because of conflict between the districts and the capital.'

Because of the conflict, absolutely NOTHING has changed. At all.

"Beacuase"

Beacuase? I've heard that before...
(YOU ONLY PRESS ONE!!!! BUT-TEN!!! THE ENTIRE TIME!!!!)

"of this they moved all the children into a highschool so teh adults have to fight in a different place."

Because absolutely happened, children got an education. HOORAY!

"Every year the kids ALL(i am mixing it up from the regular book)"

I think most people know that the Hunger Games is not, as the title suggests, a food fight that ends in mass starvation. Although that would be awesome. I'm patenting that idea.

"kids have to fight."

So much for mixing it up. I change Star Wars by giving the Jedi Magic, not the Force.

"When they get to the games they’re pokeballs lined up for people to use as wepons."

No. This is...NO. WHY THE ASS ARE THERE POKEBALLS?!

"If you have sponser they can send you a gentically altered wolf partner so they can help you fight."

Oh my dear god. I was smiling just a minute ago. Now I'm just angry. You turned The Hunger Games -- A book filled with genuinely interesting political intrigue and oppression -- into a High School, with Pokemon and Furries. SCREW YOU, BROKEN HEART TILDE SCHOOL OF HUNGER TILDE BROKEN HEART

"You prepare for the games beforehand like the legit book."

WHO CARES?

"wwe are startin’(lol eridan speech)"

What, now all the contestants are WRESTLERS, too? My god, this is going to be the most staged Hunger Games EVER.

"a little before the games start, so just act like a regular kid(whose been though a whole lotta crap lol XD)"

Just act like a normal person, who was just TORN AWAY FROM HIS PARENTS AND FRIENDS TO BECOME A WRESTLER, HAVE HIS HEART TURNED INTO A STOMACH, AND TO DO BATTLE WITH POKEBALLS AND HIS TRUSTY ANTHROPOMORPHIC ANIMAL!

I have all the cancer now. ALL THE CANCER.
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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 09:51 PM
Even if it was a troll, It had too much content not to comment on it.
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EnchantingShadows is not online. EnchantingShadows
Joined: 24 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 1325
01 Jun 2012 09:51 PM
[ Content Deleted ]
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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 09:53 PM
I practice a lot.
Moar threads?
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hollyflower93 is not online. hollyflower93
Joined: 24 Aug 2009
Total Posts: 991
01 Jun 2012 09:54 PM
http://www.roblox.com/Forum/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=69017567
Ugh. Almost no plot and overused subject.
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Quilboar is not online. Quilboar
Joined: 17 May 2010
Total Posts: 18911
01 Jun 2012 09:55 PM
http://www.roblox.com/Forum/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=62079883

My roleplay ^



http://www.roblox.com/Forum/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=61776654

^ Copied roleplay
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EnchantingShadows is not online. EnchantingShadows
Joined: 24 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 1325
01 Jun 2012 09:55 PM
[ Content Deleted ]
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CapRex213 is not online. CapRex213
Joined: 14 Mar 2009
Total Posts: 15981
01 Jun 2012 09:56 PM
This one didn't my brain.

http://www.roblox.com/Forum/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=69007555
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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 09:57 PM
Can't do an analysis of it, because there's not enough content.
You know how internet reviewers will sometimes opt out of reviewing something, just because there aren't enough things to make fun of?
I could make all of one joke there.

"Whoa man, this thread perfectly captures the essence of the books. All that detail, all that development...It's just BEAUTIFUL!"

See?
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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 09:58 PM
/was talking to Holly.

Hey guys, I'll invite you all to a party, if you wish.
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EnchantingShadows is not online. EnchantingShadows
Joined: 24 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 1325
01 Jun 2012 10:00 PM
[ Content Deleted ]
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MrGiraffe1 is not online. MrGiraffe1
Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Total Posts: 23833
01 Jun 2012 10:00 PM
:O

yayyyy
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hollyflower93 is not online. hollyflower93
Joined: 24 Aug 2009
Total Posts: 991
01 Jun 2012 10:01 PM
Sure
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Xilirite is not online. Xilirite
Joined: 31 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6995
01 Jun 2012 10:01 PM
One of them is something I can't make fun of, since I know nothing of Sonic lore and for all I know, that could be an accurate depiction of it, and the other one, although cliché, is well written, and at least makes the good choice to not let people have weapons.
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Graulas is not online. Graulas
Joined: 26 Nov 2010
Total Posts: 8634
01 Jun 2012 10:01 PM
I laughed out loud so bad, my grandmother thought I was chocking.
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bebithetuffle is not online. bebithetuffle
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 28080
01 Jun 2012 10:02 PM
Amazing.
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