itunes89
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| Joined: 19 Jan 2011 |
| Total Posts: 1957 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 09:38 AM |
**Note: You will only get these if you are a programmer, reading them otherwise is just a waste of your time**
What's your best programming joke(s)?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up? Because DEC 25 = OCT 31 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you keep a programmer in the shower all day? Give him a bottle of shampoo which says "lather, rinse, repeat." ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My favorite! A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"
Post yours below, please make sure to follow Robloxs Rules. |
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Aerideyn
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| Joined: 16 Jan 2010 |
| Total Posts: 1882 |
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itunes89
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| Joined: 19 Jan 2011 |
| Total Posts: 1957 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 09:51 AM |
In Soviet Russia the console logs YOU
#Originality |
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Parthax
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| Joined: 27 Apr 2011 |
| Total Posts: 6941 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 09:52 AM |
....
❖ VOID Overseer Parthax ❖ |
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| 20 Apr 2013 10:00 AM |
@Part,
Sorry, I couldn't think up of anything better. |
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coplox
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| Joined: 07 Jun 2008 |
| Total Posts: 3252 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 11:02 AM |
How long does it take a programmer to make dinner? However long it takes to compile. |
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| 20 Apr 2013 11:05 AM |
“Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” very long pause…. “Java.” |
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| 20 Apr 2013 11:14 AM |
“Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” "Umm dunno... Oh yeah, Roblox" |
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nairod7
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| Joined: 26 Mar 2010 |
| Total Posts: 869 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 11:26 AM |
“Knock, knock.” “Who’s..." "Hello, I'm a program made in assembly, I don't need any compiler, ehehe" "...there... gosh o;o" |
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TekBomber
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| Joined: 14 May 2012 |
| Total Posts: 1927 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 11:33 AM |
Anybody play with BASIC?
Im gonna make a notepad program in it for poops and giggles. |
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TekBomber
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| Joined: 14 May 2012 |
| Total Posts: 1927 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 11:46 AM |
Do you know anybody that still uses COBOL?
Neither do I.. |
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itunes89
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| Joined: 19 Jan 2011 |
| Total Posts: 1957 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 12:03 PM |
Q: how many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: none, that's a hardware problem --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs. |
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Seranok
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| Joined: 12 Dec 2009 |
| Total Posts: 11083 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 12:09 PM |
| There is an excellent stackoverflow question on this very topic. It is titled "What is your best programmer joke?" |
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TheMyrco
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| Joined: 13 Aug 2011 |
| Total Posts: 15105 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 12:38 PM |
C is evolving! ... C evolved into C++!
Java uses memory eat... ...it's super effective! |
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ball360
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| Joined: 31 Mar 2009 |
| Total Posts: 1557 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 12:38 PM |
9,432 errors from the linker 9,432 errors Fix one up, run it through 10,789 error from the linker |
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ball360
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| Joined: 31 Mar 2009 |
| Total Posts: 1557 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 12:40 PM |
A C programmer walks into a bar. The bartender directs the programmer to the tenth seat (the last seat) in the bar. The programmer looks the bartender in the eye and says, "There is no tenth seat.". |
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| 20 Apr 2013 12:41 PM |
"I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code." -Reflecting opensource in today's software world. :)
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| 20 Apr 2013 12:45 PM |
Oh, I love the syntax error one, especially on Windows!
>if you're happy and you know it, syntax error! happy was unexpected at this time. |
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Dr01d3k4
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| Joined: 11 Oct 2007 |
| Total Posts: 17916 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 12:49 PM |
I've got 2 bookmarked pages for these. Here are some:
Have you heard about the new Cray super computer? It’s so fast, it executes an infinite loop in 6 seconds.
The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance.
From the Random Shack Data Processing Dictionary: Endless Loop: n., see Loop, Endless. Loop, Endless: n., see Endless Loop.
“You shall not pass by reference”, said Gandalf to James Gosling
A garbage collector joined Men in Black to help them with erasing memory.
And another for "shooting yourself in the foot in various programming languages" (google this):
Linux: You shoot yourself in the foot with a Gnu.
Windows 95: Your gun is not compatible with this OS and you must buy an upgrade and install it before you may continue. Then you will be informed that you don't have enough memory. |
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ball360
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| Joined: 31 Mar 2009 |
| Total Posts: 1557 |
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MrChubbs
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| Joined: 14 Oct 2010 |
| Total Posts: 4969 |
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| 20 Apr 2013 12:56 PM |
No one has pointed out the most obvious and well known one,
"There are 10 types of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't." |
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