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a story with no title that I randomly wrote

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shadowguy25 is not online. shadowguy25
Joined: 28 Nov 2010
Total Posts: 2547
10 Feb 2013 07:16 PM
Really bored so I started writing a random story, not really sure what it is about, and what the title is. Lol. You don't need to read, and I don't really care about your opinions on it either. :/ I have not finished.
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I wake up dazed, opening my eyes open to a white ceiling with dimmed bar lights. I notice I was lying in bed, surrounded by very few things, a very small table and a chair at the end of the bed, and two curtains on each side. I attempt to get up, with a grueling pain in my chest developing in progress. With a quiet yelp of agony, I continue at a slow pace. My feet touch the cold ground. Struggling, my arms shaking against the bed, too weak to lift myself up, I fall to the ground and rest my head against the bed. I felt hot, and a sizzling pain surged through my entire body. What happened? Where am I? Why am I here? There were many questions jumping around in my mind. I needed answers, the motivation made me get up again, ignoring the throbbing which indeed where from my wounds, but from where? I skid my bandaged feet pass the curtains, and looked to the left as there was a window, it is night time. Looking into the night sky, my vision slowly turns to the pass.
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calculator73 is not online. calculator73
Joined: 20 Aug 2011
Total Posts: 24725
10 Feb 2013 07:20 PM
Seems pretty good so far.
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shadowguy25 is not online. shadowguy25
Joined: 28 Nov 2010
Total Posts: 2547
10 Feb 2013 07:29 PM
Thank you.
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wilfrerocks867 is not online. wilfrerocks867
Joined: 24 Apr 2011
Total Posts: 4062
10 Feb 2013 07:31 PM
reminds me of a movie where a guy wakes up in a hospital and there is no one around and he has no memory of what happened
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moonlight9989 is not online. moonlight9989
Joined: 08 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 13162
10 Feb 2013 07:31 PM
It's pretty good, but some of your tenses need fixing
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starwarsbrony43 is not online. starwarsbrony43
Joined: 17 Jul 2012
Total Posts: 13142
10 Feb 2013 07:32 PM
Ironic that you're a good writer and your name is "shadow".
Because there's this guy, Shadowfan and... oh god he writes awful.
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shadowguy25 is not online. shadowguy25
Joined: 28 Nov 2010
Total Posts: 2547
10 Feb 2013 07:33 PM
I am just saying, I am not trying to base this off of anything. Just came to my mind.

I actually have to say, I stink at writing. My grammar is very poor and I usually write run on sentences and fragments.

derp.
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Stevey254 is not online. Stevey254
Joined: 25 Mar 2011
Total Posts: 11
10 Feb 2013 07:38 PM
Keep writing and don't give up on it. Maybe someone may publish it as a book.
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thenewfoundland is not online. thenewfoundland
Joined: 18 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 2364
10 Feb 2013 07:39 PM
its pretty good, and you don't need a title yet

its best to decide a title at the end of writing
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commanderdajones is not online. commanderdajones
Joined: 18 Nov 2009
Total Posts: 188
10 Feb 2013 07:43 PM
Pretty good so far, Shadow. I see you have some writing skill. Even though you don't see it.
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shadowguy25 is not online. shadowguy25
Joined: 28 Nov 2010
Total Posts: 2547
10 Feb 2013 08:05 PM
@Dajones
Yeyeyeyeye. I just notice I made a weird mistake I the first sentence. Ugh.
@Starwars
Haha, thanks.
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tnt91 is not online. tnt91
Joined: 14 Aug 2008
Total Posts: 43390
10 Feb 2013 08:07 PM
.. no offense .. but fail
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ok876 is not online. ok876
Joined: 20 May 2010
Total Posts: 2285
10 Feb 2013 08:08 PM
I don't feel like reading this right now, SO TRACK!


ok876
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goco2 is not online. goco2
Joined: 21 Nov 2011
Total Posts: 950
11 Feb 2013 06:37 PM
continued: Suddenly a tall man with broad shoulders and ruffled hair steps in.
"I see your finally awake." He said
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thepolmoguy is not online. thepolmoguy
Joined: 12 Feb 2012
Total Posts: 4
25 Feb 2013 07:52 PM
needs more ninjas
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