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| 30 Jan 2013 01:05 PM |
Grand Theft Auto: >drive girl around town >hit like 50 people, get massive blood stains on car >hit cops and other cars, dent the car >"That was nice. I'm really interested in seeing you again."
Counter Strike: >about to start gunfight in desert >dresses as if going to Antarctica
Battlefield 3: >shotgun kills from across the map >RPG at point blank range = 25% damage
General gamer logic: "The harder you press the button, the stronger the attack would be."
Call Of Duty: >snipers run around the map and shoot enemies >soldiers with assault rifles lie in corners and wait
Battlefield 3: "Oh, your tank is on fire? Let me fix that with some more fire!"
Assassin's Creed: >need to withdraw money >buys a bank
Deus Ex: "Can't lift that cardboard box to jump the fence? Better use that dumpster instead."
Skyrim: >explore ancient cavern deep underground >find box with fresh fruit
Assassin's Creed: >"I need to keep things confidential." >lets you browse her personal e-mail
Battlefield 3: >can run with 20 pound machine gun >can't throw 5 pound C4 over 2 feet
Battlefield 1942: >tank can take several bazooka hits >explodes when driving over a hill
Red Dead Redemption: >survive shotgun to the chest with no medical attention >ride horse into water and die instantly
Battlefield: >get hit by an RPG and fall 100 feet out of a helicopter >brought back to life with a defibrillator
Borderlands: >open toilet to poop >find ammo
Civilization 5: >friendly nations for over 4000 years >denounced over not giving free iron
Counter Strike: >elite international counter-terrorism unit >buy their own guns
Counter Strike Source: >eight different character models >all with identical forearms and gloves
Gears Of War: >food supply is extremely limited >soldiers maintain amazing muscle mass
Fallout 3: >spent entire life in sealed vault >knows how to swim
Fallout 3: >drink one glass of wine >addicted to alcohol
Counter Strike Global Offensive: >incindeary grenade, purpose engineered grenade >$850 >molotov, glass bottle with petrol and rag >$850
Fallout 3: "I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's the pa(sswo)rd to access top secret archives that could completely destroy our order maybe?"
Dead Rising 2: >places paddle and chainsaw in workbench >creates paddle with two chainsaws attached
Fallout 3: >repairs all technologocally advanced weaponry >can't fix a simple car engine
Deus Ex police logic: >unfamiliar face at office? >shoot him dead
Fallout 3: >turns off pipboy light when sneaking >blasts music from radio
Final Fantasy VII: >10 minutes to detonation >uses 10 seconds to celebrate victory in battle
Diablo 3: "I dual-wield rapid-firing crossbows. Your argument is invalid."
Game Developer Logic: >she needs armour >but not on her bewbs or ass |
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