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Harry131291 is not online. Harry131291
Joined: 13 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1883
25 Dec 2012 09:58 PM
I remember the whole entire universe being black. No stars had formed yet. No galaxies had been blown into existence. And then, an abrupt explosion of washed out color filled my eyes. It blurred. The image became sharper by the minute, as did the searing pain in both of my knees. The pain slowly began to spread from the numb around the whole of both of my legs. The image of the world my eyes had forbidden me to see just six minutes ago. It was a warehouse. Or, at least, it looked like one. The only thing readable for me was the 'This side up' sign on the crates stackled all throughout the room. The room was a whole new level of grey, covered in a thick layer of dust and sprinkles of dirt. The world seemed to be falling away slowly. I looked around and saw my body unstationary. No body part was on the ground, no string or pulley was attatched to me. I was falling up. But it was slow. I was falling as slow as it took for the odd side of it to come out of the shadows and hit me square in the face. HUMANS DON'T FLOAT. THEY DON'T FALL UP. And yet, I still seemed to be completely obliterating gravitie's rules. I had no control, no movement except to flail my arms. I noticed that the pain in my legs had long since gone. It had been missing ever since my feet had glided off of any flat surface, whether covered with dust or completely gone missing. I also noticed an incredible pain in my arm. I wanted to scream, but my mouth seemed frozen open. I could hear sound. It was a voice. It was MY voice.
"Look, Jessica, I can't help you. I'm sorry but I-" was all I heard. The voice faded out, rotating all around my head but finding a way to blend in with the silence. The next subtle sound I heard was a bloodcurdling scream, followed by a chilling yell of the word, 'Jessica' by a male voice. Then I heard the large snap, and immediately the blinding pain in my arm had vanished. I also noticed that my arm was being hung up, and a chain was slowly twisting itself off of my arm like a metal snake. I looked down to see that thirty feet below me, there was the spot where I had found myself lying half an hour ago, like being born into the world. I can't tell if I should use the word, 'Again'. I saw a figure. a n odd mixture of a demon and a human. It had it's leg out at my stomache, which was slowly but surely racing towards the boot. Once my stomache had collided with the boot, the figure's foot unhurriedly rebounded and started to go back, like a reverse kick. That's exactly what it was. My body started to fall forward after his kick collided, and eventually I was in a casual footing. His foot lazily moved to the ground and he went to a normal stading stance. We both stared off for a split second, when my body took full control and started tilting backwards. The figure watched as I grabed the ground as sure footing and lazily laid down. Once on the floor, I started to slide forward, dust dismerging into the ground as I went. I then fell up agai n, this time falling into my own footing. The figure's fist started to sidecut towards my face and once I regained my actual footing, I remained in a shocked position for a second until his fist collided with my face. I then proceeded to stand normally and then started to do a moonwalk of some sort, while the figure backwards ran slowly behind a couple of crates. And then time stood still. I couldn't move my eyes, couldn't think. And the situation clicked, as did my memory. The figure was known as The superior, one who captured people and tortured them in this warehouse for complete fun. The terror all came flooding back as I remembered sitting in the broken chair behind me and watching four other people get brutally murdered. I couldn't cry, or yell. I could only see. And then I broke out. Silently. I actually thought I was getting out of here. The next moment was time moving forward and my body began to walk forward normally to the exact spot that I was punched before. I stopped myself as I realized, but it was too late. The figure jumped out and hit me square in the jaw. I remember briefly this whole thing happening two times. Nature was giving me chances, and I was wasting them. Not this time. I refused to fall, and instead stumbled away, dodging the figure's kick. I grabbed him by his dark hoodie and threw him hard as I could. I started to run away, and I hid behind some crates. I watched as the figure walked right past the crates, go around a corner, then come back. He walked softly, as if expecting me to be running away somewhere. I took him completely by surprise by jumping out and punching him. he fell back, and when he got up I kicked him. For a brief moment, I felt something bothering me on my head. It itched. But then I watched as the figure flew back and his arm got caught in a couple of chains. I heard a snap and a scream, and once again felt something itchy on my head. I discarded it once again as the figure fell out of the chains, screaming desperately. He fell at least thirty feet before me hearing the dissatisfying snap of his legs breaking as he hit the ground. He squirmed a little, then went limp. I stapped back a couple of steps of relief. Once more I felt the itch on my head, greater than ever. Curious and a tad angry, I flung my arm onto my head. What I felt was an odd cloth. I looked at my sleeves and saw that I was wearing the exact clothes that the attacker was. And then, my hands started to slowly go down, and I started to take a couple steps forward, in reverse of the events my body had succeeded to make occur just moments ago.
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Harry131291 is not online. Harry131291
Joined: 13 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1883
26 Dec 2012 11:36 AM
Bump.
Feedback please?
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Harry131291 is not online. Harry131291
Joined: 13 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1883
31 Dec 2012 02:33 AM
Bump. Anyone?
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GhrodinhRTCitia is not online. GhrodinhRTCitia
Joined: 18 Dec 2012
Total Posts: 502
01 Jan 2013 09:08 PM
[ Content Deleted ]
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Harry131291 is not online. Harry131291
Joined: 13 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1883
02 Jan 2013 03:33 PM
@Ghrodinh
Thank you for your feedback. And about that last sentence, maybe you should think about the fact that this was the first story I wrote that got bad feedback.
I was trying out new things. Please state it a little nicer next time.
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