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Re: Can anyone help with my prologue?

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mysterygang13 is not online. mysterygang13
Joined: 25 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 4497
15 Dec 2012 12:45 AM
A scream pierced the night’s silence. I ran even faster, fearing whom the scream was from, and heard it again, louder this time. I realized the scream had come from me, so I made an effort not to. Something was chasing me, it was hairy, large, and was easily identified as a predator with its claws and razor sharp teeth. It growled and continued bounding after me, I would soon be overtaken. It took a leap, soaring through the air, it landed in front of me and before I could even turn around, it attacked. A final scream fled from my mouth, and then everything went black.


I need ways to enhance, I want to make sure I grab the reader's attention.

~There are three kinds of people in this world. Those who can count, and those who cannot.
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LeslieVernon is not online. LeslieVernon
Joined: 15 Jul 2012
Total Posts: 10800
15 Dec 2012 12:56 AM
The black of night became even more blackened by the endless screaming. I ran faster unaware of my surroundings. I realized I was the source of the screaming. But I couldn't control it. It was just too much to be chased by what ever it was. All I could see was its size which seemed to grow with the everlasting dark. That was when I tripped and felt it cut through the crisp air. I screamed. And then silence.
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