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Re: Lurking Shadows (BOOK 1 OF MY WARRIORS)

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Emberashes101 is not online. Emberashes101
Joined: 17 Jun 2012
Total Posts: 377
25 Aug 2012 09:28 PM
(NICE AND POSICTVE COMMENTS ONLY!)

~Chapter 1~

SongKit wakes up with a soft yawn, she looks around the nursery. She looks under her bed and finds her mossball; she smiles and paws the mossball into the open with her small paws.
As Flamestar woke up, she wondered how SongKit was doing.She got up and went to the nurcury. As she went, she saw she was fine and playing with her moss ball.
I look over and see FlameStar, "Hi FlameStar!" I purr as i lightly kick the mossball so it would stay with me. I grab the mossball in my paws and lash my tail side to side happily as I looked up at FlameStar.
"I see that you’re very hyper today."I looked at the mossball. "And also that your probally practicing your hunting skills on that." I said happily. I turned and
Walked out of the nurcury. "She will make a fine warrior...." she said to no one but herself.
I nodd and grab my moss ball. I sniff it for a bit the kick it as hard as I could and it goes flying behind the warriors den.
I try to use my nose to find out where it went; I go behind the elders den first. "Not here." I mew; I sniff again and follow my nose to the warriors den.
I trip over a rock and fall, "Oof!" I mewled. Then I got back up and shooke the dust from my fur. I tried to follow my nose again.
It led me behind the warriors den. I then saw my mossball. "Mossball!" I mew and pounce on it.
"Whos out there?" asked a cat inside the warriors den. She peered out looking for the kit.
"Oh, its you.What are you doing near the Warriors den anyway?" she asked.
The cat sighed."Oh. I see that you were chasing a mossball." The she-cat looked at Songkits leg. "Mabie you want to go see Brightfur, the medicene cat. Your leg is bleeding. Also I'm Whispersong the depudy." said Whispersong.
"Whispersong!" called out Flamestar. "I must go little one." Whispersong told Songkit. "I expect more from my depudy, besidides you gossiping with kits!" said Flamestar amused.
"Go get the dawn patrol ready." asked Flamestar. "Yes Flamestar!" Whispersong called as she hurried away. SongKit I look at her and nodd, and then i looked back at my leg shocked.
"Thanks." I mew to her then flick my tail in goodbye to Flamestar, and then I trot over to BrightFur. "Brightheart!” I mew.
"Yes Songkit?" replied Brightfur. "Oh your leg. Come right it. Ill fix it right up." Brightfur said softly.

Brightfur put Goldenrod on her leg and wrapped cobweb around it, and finished just was Flamestar called a meeting.
Songkit walked out. She peered up at Highrock. She saw Wolfkit was up there. "Wolfkit, until you have earned your warrior name,
You shall now be called Wolfpaw. Whispersong, it is time for you to have another apprentice. You will be Wolfpaws mentor."
Flamestar said. "Meeting is now ov--" said Flamestar being interrupted by the breaking through of Moonclans cats.
She jumped down. Songkit ran behind Brightfur. Maybe I can do something in this battle to earn my Apprentice name! Thought Songkit.
She ran into the Nursery and started kicking mossballs at the warriors and apprentices that raided the camp.
After Songkit ran out, she went to check the battle with Fireclan. She saw a big cat tumble over Flamestar.
Songkit raced over. "Songkit, no!" shouted Flamestar pinned. The leader looked much smaller under this big cat.
"Get off her!" yowled Songkit. The grey and silver cat turned. "Oh, look isn't that sweet. A little kit looking after her leader." the cat said.
The big she-cat unsheathed and sheathed her claws getting ready to kill Songkit. "Midnightstar. Let. Her. Go. Now." Flamestar breathed at the leader.
Then Flamestar leaped at Midnightstar, tearing at her ears. She yowled in rage. "Fallenclan retreat!!!" Midnightstar yelled. But a louder yowled sounded
over Midnightstars. It was Whispersong. Fallenclan retreated. "Fallenclan?" said Flamestar. "The only clans here are Fireclan, Moonclan, Pondclan,
And Sunclan. Then there are our ancestors in Starclan." Songkit wasn’t listening; she just dashed off with Wolfpaw towards Whispersong.
"Brightfur!!' called Wolfpaw as she peered inside the cats' den.”Yes?" called Brightfur through a mouthful of herbs.
"Whispersong is hurt badly. Are those for her?" Wolfpaw replied. "These? No, but since I was heading that way to the Elders, I'll give these to her.
As they padded over there, Songkit could smell something. It wasn’t pleasant. She saw that Whispersong's body is limp.
"Were too late." breathed Brightheart. "And if any of you two can smell that, that’s the smell of death."

~Chapter 2~

Whispersong’s sister, Dawnheart, helped carry the body to the middle of the camp. Songkit helped, just by making sure her tail doesn’t drag on the ground. Every cat stood around her in grief. Everyone in the clan knew her as a sister basically. Flamestar bowed her head in grief, murmuring in her white fur. In the morning, the three elders, Tangledpath, Dapplepelt, and the loner Sasha, went to bury Whispersong. Flamestar called a meeting. “Let all cats gather beneath Highrock. Today we have lost our depudy, Whispersong. I shall now choose a new depudy, along with a new mentor for Wolfpaw. Sandchronical, you shall mentor Wolfpaw. Pumpkinpelt, you are the new depudy. And before I close the meeting, does anyone know about Fallenclan?” asked Flamestar. A cat walked into the camp saying “I do.” Songkit was startled by the cat. “My name is Patchstar.” she said. “This Fallenclan, this was once what Moonclan was.” “Patchstar. How come Moonclan is now Fallenclan?” asked Flamestar. Patchstar padded up beside Flamestar, and talked; “I was once leader of Moonclan. I made Mysticeyes depudy. Her sister, Midnightheart, did not like it one bit. She chased us out with moves only she could’ve learned from the Dark Forest. Songkit gasped. “Dark forest?” she mewed. “What’s that?” “The Dark Forest is where evil cats go when they die. Just like Tigerpath.” Flamestar replied. “And thank you Patchstar for telling us what happened to Moonclan.” “And if your wondering why the name has changed, it’s because I said Fallenclan was its true name. Starclan told me to tell her that. Really, Moonclan is the only name Moonclan ever had.” said Patchstar. “Anyway, this meeting is over.” Said Flamestar as she saw only a few warriors and Wolfpaw remained. Night was coming. Songkit headed to Moonshine, her mother. She curled up beside her, and gazed at the stars. Songkit thought she saw a Star flicker. It was bigger then any other stars. She soon fell asleep.

The next morning, she thought about the flickering star. “All cats gather beneath Highrock.” Yowled Flamestar. Songkit jumped. Moonshine rushed over and started licking her ears. “Hey!” mewed Songkit. “If you don’t want to be an apprentice, that’s fine with me.” Said Moonshine softly.
Songkit just remembered that she was turning 6 moons that day. She ran beneath Highrock. I got to hold my excitement in otherwise I would still be a kit! Thought Songkit. Her mentor was Flamestar. How lucky I am! Thought Songkit. Her best friend, Pumpkinpaw was being mentored by Rushfeet.

“Now crouch. Keep your weight even Pumpkinpaw.” Said Rushfeet, at the next day at training. “And Songpaw, please stop kicking the leafs.” Added Flamestar. “Now, Songpaw, you pretend that you are hiding in bushes.” “Okay.” Said Songpaw. She crouched, thinking she’s in some bushes. “Now stalk forward as best as you can.” Mewed Flamestar. Songpaw stalked. She only rustled the leaves a bit. “Great job!” complemented Pumpkinpaw. “I think we did enough training. Lets try hunting.” Said Rushfeet.
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bebithetuffle is not online. bebithetuffle
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 28080
25 Aug 2012 09:31 PM
"Nice and positive"

Someone can't take criticism.
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Emberashes101 is not online. Emberashes101
Joined: 17 Jun 2012
Total Posts: 377
26 Aug 2012 10:27 AM
I just HATE that they flip out for no stupid reason. SO if you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything :\
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amasingcloe is not online. amasingcloe
Joined: 31 May 2011
Total Posts: 32
26 Aug 2012 02:18 PM
=D :D AWESOME!!!!!! cant wait for chapter 3.
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keyra14 is not online. keyra14
Joined: 19 Jan 2009
Total Posts: 5640
26 Aug 2012 03:25 PM
Nicee.
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bebithetuffle is not online. bebithetuffle
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 28080
26 Aug 2012 04:08 PM
Too bad, this is crap and you have the grammar of a sock with downs.
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blanchey is not online. blanchey
Joined: 17 Feb 2012
Total Posts: 1734
26 Aug 2012 04:12 PM
I can't say anything nice because I saw no change so I am force to just grunt *Grunts* and do this. ...
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vamking12 is not online. vamking12
Joined: 08 May 2010
Total Posts: 17651
26 Aug 2012 04:17 PM
this sucks
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DoomDark is not online. DoomDark
Joined: 24 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 2092
26 Aug 2012 04:18 PM
vam didn't you quit
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amasingcloe is not online. amasingcloe
Joined: 31 May 2011
Total Posts: 32
26 Aug 2012 07:19 PM
=/ i just relised Y R PEAPLE READING IT IF THEY THINK IT SUCKS
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keyra14 is not online. keyra14
Joined: 19 Jan 2009
Total Posts: 5640
26 Aug 2012 07:30 PM
@amasing:


I know right. If they don't like it, why bother waste their time further and reply.
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bebithetuffle is not online. bebithetuffle
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 28080
26 Aug 2012 08:02 PM
I didn't read it, who says I have to read it?
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keyra14 is not online. keyra14
Joined: 19 Jan 2009
Total Posts: 5640
26 Aug 2012 08:58 PM
Damnit, Bebi. This is why you make me mad.



Half the time, you don't even bother reading what you're insulting. God, if you aren't going to read it, don't click on the damn thread.
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SuperBuilder340 is not online. SuperBuilder340
Joined: 29 Oct 2008
Total Posts: 16242
26 Aug 2012 09:01 PM
He doesn't have to read it to know it's bad, because it's a warrior cats story.
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bebithetuffle is not online. bebithetuffle
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 28080
26 Aug 2012 09:02 PM
I read a bit of it, it's close enough.
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bebithetuffle is not online. bebithetuffle
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 28080
26 Aug 2012 09:03 PM
*I read a bit of it, it's horrid.
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keyra14 is not online. keyra14
Joined: 19 Jan 2009
Total Posts: 5640
26 Aug 2012 09:12 PM
@Super:


Get the hell out. No. Some warrior cats stories are so well written, you are gonna say it's bad, then read it, and like it. So get the hell out, just go. If you think EVERY GOD DAMN warrior cats fan story if terrible, you either need a new brain, or you just need to go die.





@Bebi:



Now, YOU. You can atleast try to act NICE when you're telling people about their story/roleplay. Because the way you act, makes people think you are a stupid, jerk who can't learn to be nice. I understand that you're just giving advice, but SERIOUSLY? Do you HAVE to act like the rudest person on the face of the Earth?
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SuperBuilder340 is not online. SuperBuilder340
Joined: 29 Oct 2008
Total Posts: 16242
26 Aug 2012 09:14 PM
Okay, I'll read it.
>SongKit
oops stopped reading there
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SuperBuilder340 is not online. SuperBuilder340
Joined: 29 Oct 2008
Total Posts: 16242
26 Aug 2012 09:19 PM
Also, I can't believe that you're telling me to go die because I don't like reading about cats doing stuff.
okay
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xXcandyXx is not online. xXcandyXx
Joined: 09 Mar 2009
Total Posts: 10415
26 Aug 2012 09:29 PM
Wow. If you don't like the books then don't read this.

Stupid trollz -.-
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bebithetuffle is not online. bebithetuffle
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 28080
26 Aug 2012 10:21 PM
Wow, if you're that ignorant you must have downs.

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keyra14 is not online. keyra14
Joined: 19 Jan 2009
Total Posts: 5640
27 Aug 2012 07:03 PM
._."


See? Do you have to be such a god damn jerk? Does it matter if somebody is ignorant?
Bebi, you are just being rude.
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bebithetuffle is not online. bebithetuffle
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 28080
27 Aug 2012 07:40 PM
I care if friends are smart or not.
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SP2398salt is not online. SP2398salt
Joined: 10 Jan 2010
Total Posts: 11130
27 Aug 2012 07:50 PM
*blinks*

why did i even click this f0rsaken thread

it's full 0f dumb and stupid

als0 why i'm n0t using grammar is f0r n0 reas0n.
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amasingcloe is not online. amasingcloe
Joined: 31 May 2011
Total Posts: 32
27 Aug 2012 09:36 PM
ok for goodnes sake anyone who stinken reads the thread is just not rlly smart it just means ur bad at school couse u dont read and if u think warrior cats is bad then y dont u just shut up becouse i bet u secretley like it but dont wanna tell anyone.
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