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| 20 Aug 2012 05:25 PM |
100 ways to get kicked out of Wal-Mart
1. Take someone’s shopping cart and switch the items with stuff from the person next to they’re cart
2. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven’t seen you in so long! …" Etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
3. Smash the person in front of you on the head with a ham… (And laugh, loudly if they get mad.)
4. Go up to some old geezer & say "Grandpa!!! You’re ALIVE!!! It’s a MIRACLE!!!” <--Etc.
5. Take something from someone else’s cart, when they say, "hey, that’s mine!” call the security and say that the other … person was trying to take your _____
5. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
6. Hide in the center of the clothes circle where people find shirts and jump out and yell "AHAHAIHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!"
7. Go into the dressing room, wait a few minutes, then yell "THERES NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!!"
8. Get a batman costume, put it on, and run around the store screaming at the top of your lungs, "COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!"
9. Get a small kiddy bike and begin riding it around the store screaming “WOOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!” 10. Hide between clothing and then jump out and yell "PICK ME!"
11. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won’t you people just leave me alone?"
12. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men
13. Hide in a clothes circle. When someone with a shopping cart goes by stick your hand out and steal something from them
14. Grab a guitar and start singing “Wake Me up when September ends” in a loud shrieking half screaming voice.
15. Randomly place 24 bags of candy in people’s carts.
16. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
17. Go up to an employee and in an official tone say, "code three in house wares" and see what happens.
18. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department
19. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap. Always give them one and then shout, “I wanted the ____ one!!!”
20. Set up a concert of singing hamster dolls. Get your friends and turn them on all at the same time. Then act like a conductor.
21. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
22. Open a pack of yugioh cards and challenge random people to a "d-d-d-d-d-d-duel!"
23. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation
24. Tape a walkie-talkie to the back of a Barbie doll and say to random people, "I know where you live…"
25. Attempt to drown in a kiddy pool…
26. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don’t get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it
27. Open up random packages in the toy aisle then walk off. If an employee asks what you’re doing, just say, "I changed my mind."
28. Run around Wal-Mart in a bathing suit singing the Surfin’ USA theme song
29. Say things like, "Would you be as kind so to direct me to your Twinkies?"
30. If an employee comes within 30 ft scream "GET AWAY FROM ME!!!" Then run out of the store screaming
31. Walk up to an employee and ask questions like how come this store is called “wal” mart?” Or “what’s up with your hair? Why do you people wear nametags can’t you all remember your own names?”
32. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles…
33. Glare menacingly at anyone who comes within 40 ft of you. Then hiss like a snake and act like you’re going to bite them.
34. Throw a fake rubber snake into some lady’s face and watch her freak out!
35. Squeeze their legs and either sing, "I like to move it, move it!” Or say, "You got chicken legs!"
36. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."
37. While no one’s watching quickly switch the men’s and women’s signs on the doors of the rest room.
38. Bring your pet pit-bull into Wal-mart. Act casual. If someone is brave enough to walk up to you and tell you to get out, simply reply, "He’s going to help me pick out his favorite dog food"
39. TP as much of the store as possible
40. Whenever you hear a voice saying, “clean up” etc, fall to the ground sobbing and screaming “the voices!!” Then get back up & act normal
41. Dress up in a trench coat & wear sunglasses. Walk up to someone browsing and say "The rooster is in the nest" Wait for a reply. After they finish talking, hand them a play gun and whisper, "use this wisely."
42. Go to the music aisle and start singing horrible karaoke!
43. Look for someone who laughs, then walk up to them and say “I know, I know!”
44. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals throughout the day
45. Go in to the camping department and enter a tent then tell random costumers “Come so I can tell you your future!” In a freaky voice.
46. Broadcast K-mart commercials over the intercom.
47. Go up to the bagel section with cream cheese all over your face. Then start chanting, "We love bagels! We love bagels!"
48. Over the intercom say there is a big sale on all items in electronics department and first 10 people to the checkouts gets one item free… & see what happens.
49. Randomly start putting different size undergarments in people’s carts
50. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners
51. Run through the store and jump on random peoples carts singing “I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODYS NERVES!!!”
52. Go up to random people and poke them. If they ask you what you’re doing or tell you to stop, tell them that you’re trying to find out what they ate for dinner last night.
53. Do your American Idol audition in front of the security cameras.
54. Get a marker & go over all the barcodes with a line then go purchase your items… the person who is serving you will have to enter all the barcodes in by hand
55. Go up to some of the customers while your carrying a paper bag and say "trick or treat!" and if they don’t give you anything, do the sad puppy dog face.
56. Hide under a big pile of clothes and throw random objects at people when they walk by.
57. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good Bessie."
58. Walk up to a pizza place and ask for a Mcchicken.
59. Go to the bathroom with a cantaloupe (hidden) make grunting noises and drop the cantaloupe in the toilet. Then say "Phew, That’s better"
60. Put blue paint on your hand and when you see someone, put your hand on their shirt and point at them and say, "A clue a clue!"
61. Go to a clerk and tell them u lost your son and ask if they can call his name over the speaker! When they ask u his name make up a ridiculous name.
62. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters
63. While humming the theme to Mission Impossible, while wearing all black, roll across the floor like a spy, the “accidentally” knock over a bunch of cans.
64. Take all the CD’s put them in the wrong place and when an employee puts them all back, yell at her and mess them up again.
65. Go to the front of the store in a baby diaper and ask a macho guy to change you.
66. Take a friend with you and a younger child and start arguing over who gets custody then have the child run away and out of the store. Then yell “CILLY COME BACk!!!”
67. Climb up a ladder & try doing a King Kong thing.
68. Run through the make-up department and yell, "There’s a dead body in aisle 3!!!"
69. Grab a can of whipped cream & find a bald guy Spray it on his head.
70. Dress up in a fairy costume, and climb up a ladder and when people go by say, "Your wish is granted"
71. Dress up as a giant smiley face and whip price signs! Then yell "ROLLBACK!!!"
72. Walk up to someone act like you can read their mind & say “sir/madam don’t think that!”
73. Walk towards a group of people and hit your head and say in a loud voice, "Shut up in there."
74. Put make up all over your face so it looks like a 2 year old did it and then say, "She’s horrible at giving make-overs!" and point to a random woman.
75. Go up to random people and ask them if they will be your friends then link arms and start to sing the friends theme song.
76. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
77. Smear ketchup on yourself, lie on your back in the kid’s aisle, and pretend to be dead.
78. Lay a 20-dollar bill on the ground and back away and when someone tries to pick it up run up to them and yell hands off my dollar!! Then got to a manager and tell him that they stole 20 dollars from you.
79. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
80. Try all of the sodas and put them back then say, "Yup, that stuff’s not poisonous."
81. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.
82. Run up to random people and ask if they like green eggs and ham.
83. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags and then attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
84. Bang on the pots and pans in the cooking aisle.
85. Act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.
86. Swing on the half price banners.
87. Go up to a random person and tap on his/her shoulder. When the person looks at you, ask what and walk off like you’re annoyed.
88. Burp and say “Mmmmm, tasty!”
89. Hold Barbie for ransom.
90. Run around with a country music CD and sing "We Will Rock you"
91. Throw random items over into the next aisle and see if you can score into someone’s cart. 92. Ride around in a Barbie jeep with Barbie in the front seat and act like you’re talking to her by saying, "Let’s bust this joint Barbie!"
93. Wrap a hose around you and shout, "AAH! I’M BEING HELD HOSTAGE!"
94. Do your own radio show over the intercom (Helps to use an annoying voice too)
95. Go to the aisle with the Star Wars stuff and hold up a Luke Skywalker toy and say, "Luke, I am your father" and make breathing noises in your Darth Vader mask.
96. Glue pennies on the floor ‘heads’ side up
97. Knock over all the shelves and run around screaming ‘EARTHQUAKE! EVERYONE RUN!
98. Find a pair of walkie-talkies and have a conversation with your self when everyone is watching you.
99. Go to the checkout and buy a bar of candy. Repeat, going to the same cash register, until the clerk notices.
100. Grab heavy but not too heavy objects and see who can throw them the most aisles over.
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| 20 Aug 2012 05:26 PM |
| You're one of the first people to make the 100 reasons yourself on OT |
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NoNoah
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| Joined: 25 Sep 2008 |
| Total Posts: 20685 |
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| 20 Aug 2012 05:27 PM |
| Because you'll totally be able to get to the telephone. |
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Somepony
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| 20 Aug 2012 05:59 PM |
Broing should do #9.
sips capri sun |
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Wander221
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| Joined: 06 Aug 2010 |
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| 20 Aug 2012 06:06 PM |
My favorites:
12. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men
26.If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don’t get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it
36. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."
41. Dress up in a trench coat & wear sunglasses. Walk up to someone browsing and say "The rooster is in the nest" Wait for a reply. After they finish talking, hand them a play gun and whisper, "use this wisely."
59. Go to the bathroom with a cantaloupe (hidden) make grunting noises and drop the cantaloupe in the toilet. Then say "Phew, That’s better"
62. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
63. While humming the theme to Mission Impossible, while wearing all black, roll across the floor like a spy, the “accidentally” knock over a bunch of cans.
68. Run through the make-up department and yell, "There’s a dead body in aisle 3!!!"
72. Walk up to someone act like you can read their mind & say “sir/madam don’t think that!”
89. Hold Barbie for ransom.
92. Ride around in a Barbie jeep with Barbie in the front seat and act like you’re talking to her by saying, "Let’s bust this joint Barbie!" |
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Tacobox99
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| Joined: 05 Jan 2012 |
| Total Posts: 3107 |
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| 20 Aug 2012 06:07 PM |
walk in, steal a few things, walk out
~ForeverAlone~ |
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| 20 Aug 2012 06:13 PM |
| i liked the earthquake one. |
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mariopoi
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| Joined: 18 Jan 2011 |
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Skanea
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| Joined: 08 Jul 2012 |
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| 20 Aug 2012 06:17 PM |
| i have to read them later i dont want my grandma to see my totaly cracking up like a nutcase over something on the computer XDXD |
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| 21 Aug 2012 07:44 AM |
| First time I read them I laughed so hard I cried. I actually tried "The voices" one. |
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Kunzite
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| Joined: 25 Feb 2010 |
| Total Posts: 7998 |
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| 21 Aug 2012 07:45 AM |
*looks at OP's username*
GET. OUT. NOW. |
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| 21 Aug 2012 07:46 AM |
You to lazy to read my Blurb?
READ. IT. NOW. |
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tsfh
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| Joined: 11 Mar 2012 |
| Total Posts: 291 |
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| 21 Aug 2012 07:46 AM |
| did you find this on facebook or something? lol, get lost nerd. ( ・ω・) |
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fancylula
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| Joined: 11 Apr 2011 |
| Total Posts: 600 |
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| 21 Aug 2012 07:49 AM |
| WOW......awesome but noobiesh |
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| 21 Aug 2012 07:50 AM |
It was on ROBLOX a loooong time ago and I thought i'd post it again. Sorry, can't take credit. |
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| 21 Aug 2012 08:01 AM |
There is another way to get kicked out of walmart...
Go up to an old lady working the register and call her a wrinkly old hag. Then, punch her in the face and RUN just keep RUNNING.
I haven't done it but I know its a good way to get you kicked out. |
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| 21 Aug 2012 08:04 AM |
| It also helps if you scream it at her too. |
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| 21 Aug 2012 08:24 AM |
Or...
You could always fake your own death infront of one of the employees. That could get you kicked out too. |
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| 21 Aug 2012 08:32 AM |
Remind me to do this one when I get the chance.
> 59. Go to the bathroom with a cantaloupe (hidden) make grunting noises and drop the cantaloupe in the toilet. Then say "Phew, That’s better"
I have the perfect cantaloupe for the job.
~The Kenny McCormick of OT~ |
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