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th112233
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| Joined: 12 Mar 2009 |
| Total Posts: 4303 |
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| 25 May 2012 01:58 PM |
tl;dr
Friendship is a potato |
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| 25 May 2012 01:58 PM |
| Not bad so far. You are great at giving details so far. And next time, don't stop mid-entry. It gets people quickly uniterested. |
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| 25 May 2012 02:03 PM |
Nice I cant wait to see PART 2
~{In the dark there is always light,and that light will punish the dark always forever}~ |
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| 25 May 2012 02:06 PM |
It has what I call a "hook",a "hook" is a word or sentence or couple of sentences that gets the reader interested.
~{In the dark there is always light,and that light will punish the dark always forever}~ |
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RichKiddo
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| Joined: 26 Aug 2010 |
| Total Posts: 3450 |
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| 25 May 2012 02:19 PM |
| Slender Man stories all suck. |
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RichKiddo
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| Joined: 26 Aug 2010 |
| Total Posts: 3450 |
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| 25 May 2012 02:21 PM |
| Impossible, they all suck too bad. |
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RichKiddo
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| Joined: 26 Aug 2010 |
| Total Posts: 3450 |
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| 25 May 2012 02:23 PM |
| Billions of crappypasta lovers/people who haven't heard of the story |
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| 25 May 2012 02:25 PM |
Please ad more.. I'm loving this story so far.
I find your lack of brains amusing |
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| 25 May 2012 02:47 PM |
| They're interesting. You should continue them if you really want to. |
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| 25 May 2012 02:48 PM |
MOAAAARRRRR!!! I R LOVES EET!!! YOU HASH MEH HANGING ON TEH EEDGE OF MAI COMPOOTER CHAIR!!!
MOOOOORRRRRRREEEE I DEMANDD EEEEET!!
I find your lack of brains amusing |
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Boeing717
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| Joined: 08 Jun 2008 |
| Total Posts: 70007 |
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| 25 May 2012 03:25 PM |
not bad
as a corollary to the never end mid entry thing i think ending mid entry would be acceptable for the last one |
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gsterman
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| Joined: 14 Sep 2008 |
| Total Posts: 7165 |
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| 25 May 2012 03:29 PM |
Not bad at all. Im so far enjoying it. Continue. |
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