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Re: Wipe Out -- my newest story

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StarFire289 is not online. StarFire289
Joined: 10 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6339
12 May 2012 04:32 PM
---Please read the entire story before commenting. Thanks!---

Prologue

Darrin stared at the devastated landscape in front of him. His entire town had been wiped out. He just didn't know what it had been wiped out by. 'Probably locusts,' Darrin thought, since all the plants were gone, too. He sighed and ran out of his old town, looking over his shoulder to have a last glance at it.

PART 1

Kaleb threw the basketball into the hoop, just before Jared had a chance to grab it. Natalia, Kaleb's sister who was the referee, shouted, "Kaleb gets 2 points!" She quickly added two tally marks to his score. "Break?" Kaleb asked Jared. "Yeah," Jared replied, and grabbed his water bottle. Natalia went over to check the mail and found a letter for Kaleb in it. "Kaleb, there's a letter for you," she said, handing him the latter. He opened it cautiously. Inside was a letter written in lousy handwriting.
'I need your help. My town has been wiped out, and previously
my sister's town was as well. Please come to find out what is
doing this injustice to my kin's homes. Please come fast. I
lived at Tavern Side. Please come!
-Darrin'
Kaleb stared in shock at the letter. He quickly got on his bike and signaled for the other two to get on theirs and follow him. He didn't say a word during the process. Quickly, the trio pedaled to Tavern Side. Darrin wasn't there, but he left a note at the entrance to the town. Kaleb read it quickly.
'Hey, me again. Try to find clues. Just know that I have no idea
what is doing this, and it is beyond my control. The sake of my
kin--and maybe even yours--lies in your hands. Please be safe.
I cannot commit to you dying, even if I hadn't done it.
-Darrin'
Kaleb stared ahead confidently. He said to the two, "We will not give up yet," Then, the trio of teens pedaled into the town searching for clues on this mystery they were on.

---PART 2 COMING SOON---
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Litemare is not online. Litemare
Joined: 10 Jul 2011
Total Posts: 50666
12 May 2012 04:37 PM
[ Content Deleted ]
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Coolguy65789021 is not online. Coolguy65789021
Joined: 29 Jul 2010
Total Posts: 4214
12 May 2012 10:40 PM
Wow pretty cool so far.
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gymnast82 is not online. gymnast82
Joined: 21 Dec 2009
Total Posts: 1145
13 May 2012 09:33 AM
It could have a tiny bit more detail in it, but it's really good so far. I can't wait to read more. Your plot line is really good.
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Bawbby is not online. Bawbby
Joined: 10 Oct 2008
Total Posts: 22139
13 May 2012 09:34 AM
why is this story about arabian food
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gymnast82 is not online. gymnast82
Joined: 21 Dec 2009
Total Posts: 1145
13 May 2012 12:17 PM
It's not about arabian food. That's just the character's name.
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StarFire289 is not online. StarFire289
Joined: 10 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6339
19 May 2012 12:57 PM
I didnt even THINK of arabian food, nonetheless food at all, when I made that. xD
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noisyjones1 is not online. noisyjones1
Joined: 17 Jul 2010
Total Posts: 5397
19 May 2012 01:02 PM
Is it just me....

Or is OT standard's low since I didn't like it one bit.

I guess I read too much advanced books and now I can't enjoy reading...

~Used to sing on mountains but the mountains washed away!
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Yui810GhostofOTPast is not online. Yui810GhostofOTPast
Joined: 01 Jan 2010
Total Posts: 16734
19 May 2012 01:05 PM
"Is it just me....

Or is OT standard's low since I didn't like it one bit."

this is what i think every single day to every story that goes on this site

~Cynical Kingslayer~
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StarFire289 is not online. StarFire289
Joined: 10 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 6339
20 May 2012 11:45 AM
@noisy
@above

I dont care if you like it or not. I tried my best and thats what matters.
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