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Re: UAF Story Chapter 1: Part 1

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PWNED99TIMES is not online. PWNED99TIMES
Joined: 25 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 542
12 Apr 2012 07:55 PM
There he was, flying over The City with a helicopter. Looking back, at the ruins, awesomer28 didn't know what to think. He was astonished by the recent battles they had fought. So many soilders dying. Looking at DiscoHeaven, right next to him, he felt more comfortable. VAK had been attacking all day long. He sat there, for hours, thinking about it watching the ruins pass out of sight. The helicopter came to a sudden stop. They had landed ontop of a building. But, this was no ordinary building. It was inside a Fort sorounded by cliffs, a field, a river with a bridge over it, across the river was a base. awesomer wanted to explore the place, but couldn't. He followed DiscoHeaven out of the helicopter. They kept walking ontop of the building until they reached the part of the base that touched the cliff. "Voice command: Open." Disco ordered. Awesomer stood there, waiting for something. He didn't know what, but for something. After about 10 seconds the wall opened and a figure apperead. It was shadowsword. He was standing there staring at awesomer. "Well, what are you waiting for?" exclaimed shadow. "Come in! We have a lot to discus...." "Sorry sir." said awesomer. He walked towards shadow, standing in the rectanglular prism shadow was in. Disco acomponied him. It was a short way down. Shadow gave them a tour of the base. At the time they reached the roof, awesomer had was already dozing off. He drifted away, looking at the backround around the Fort. He saw a sign down near the gate, Fort Sapphire. Oh, he thought. Out of the corner of his eye. He saw a ship. Shadow was talking to Disco, not aware of the situation. He grabbed a sniper, and watched the ship float adrift on the river. "Sirs, you better come see this." said awesomer, in a worried tone. Shadow and Disco walked over and grabbed two snipers. They scoped into where he was looking at. "Do not fire." ordered shadow. "May I go see what it/they want?" asked awesomer. "Alright." said shadow. "Only if you go with Disco." "Okay." said awesomer. Then him and disco took off. At the time they reached the shore, they took their snipers out. Looking for something symbolizing either allies or hostile intruders. Awesomer saw a black and red flag, waving ontop of the ship. It was a Vaktovian flag.


Sorry for any grammar errors of that sort. Reply if you want Part 2! =)
~Major serving UAF for 1 1/2+ years, PWNED99TIMES
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Vykrus is not online. Vykrus
Joined: 21 Dec 2011
Total Posts: 1895
12 Apr 2012 07:57 PM
MY EYES

Let's start a riot, a riot!
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FELOOx is not online. FELOOx
Joined: 01 Sep 2008
Total Posts: 15540
12 Apr 2012 07:59 PM
Please seperate paragraphs so that its easier to read.
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PWNED99TIMES is not online. PWNED99TIMES
Joined: 25 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 542
12 Apr 2012 08:00 PM
Okay, thanks for the recomandation and not trolling Feloo.
<3
~PWNED BY PWNED~
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ELLYKINS is not online. ELLYKINS
Joined: 07 Dec 2009
Total Posts: 8690
12 Apr 2012 08:02 PM
I don't know what you did, but don't put any symbols before typing, it messes with the Forum Enhancer.

Just a man and his will to survive.
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PWNED99TIMES is not online. PWNED99TIMES
Joined: 25 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 542
12 Apr 2012 08:02 PM

There he was, flying over The City with a helicopter. Looking back, at the ruins, awesomer28 didn't know what to think. He was astonished by the recent battles they had fought. So many soilders dying. Looking at DiscoHeaven, right next to him, he felt more comfortable. VAK had been attacking all day long. He sat there, for hours, thinking about it watching the ruins pass out of sight.

The helicopter came to a sudden stop. They had landed ontop of a building. But, this was no ordinary building. It was inside a Fort sorounded by cliffs, a field, a river with a bridge over it, across the river was a base. awesomer wanted to explore the place, but couldn't. He followed DiscoHeaven out of the helicopter. They kept walking ontop of the building until they reached the part of the base that touched the cliff. "Voice command: Open." Disco ordered. Awesomer stood there, waiting for something. He didn't know what, but for something. After about 10 seconds the wall opened and a figure apperead. It was shadowsword. He was standing there staring at awesomer. "Well, what are you waiting for?" exclaimed shadow. "Come in! We have a lot to discuss...." "Sorry sir." said awesomer. He walked towards shadow, standing in the rectanglular prism shadow was in. Disco acomponied him.

It was a short way down. Shadow gave them a tour of the base. At the time they reached the roof, awesomer had was already dozing off. He drifted away, looking at the backround around the Fort. He saw a sign down near the gate, Fort Sapphire. Oh, he thought. Out of the corner of his eye. He saw a ship. Shadow was talking to Disco, not aware of the situation. He grabbed a sniper, and watched the ship float adrift on the river. "Sirs, you better come see this." said awesomer, in a worried tone. Shadow and Disco walked over and grabbed two snipers. They scoped into where he was looking at. "Do not fire." ordered shadow. "May I go see what it/they want?" asked awesomer. "Alright." said shadow. "Only if you go with Disco." "Okay." said awesomer. Then him and disco took off. At the time they reached the shore, they took their snipers out. Looking for something symbolizing either allies or hostile intruders. Awesomer saw a black and red flag, waving ontop of the ship. It was a Vaktovian flag.


Sorry for any grammar errors of that sort. Reply if you want Part 2! =)
~Major serving UAF for 1 1/2+ years, PWNED99TIMES~


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PWNED99TIMES is not online. PWNED99TIMES
Joined: 25 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 542
12 Apr 2012 08:03 PM
Oh, thanks for the comment ELLY, can you still read it though?
~PWNED BY PWNED~
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ELLYKINS is not online. ELLYKINS
Joined: 07 Dec 2009
Total Posts: 8690
12 Apr 2012 08:06 PM
I can, but barely, it's quite difficult, the text is tiny and looks weird. Good so far, though!

Just a man and his will to survive.
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PWNED99TIMES is not online. PWNED99TIMES
Joined: 25 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 542
12 Apr 2012 08:12 PM
bump
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PWNED99TIMES is not online. PWNED99TIMES
Joined: 25 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 542
12 Apr 2012 08:24 PM
bump
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PWNED99TIMES is not online. PWNED99TIMES
Joined: 25 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 542
12 Apr 2012 08:33 PM
bump
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brickeydudeman is not online. brickeydudeman
Joined: 05 Nov 2011
Total Posts: 132
12 Apr 2012 09:04 PM
DO A PART TWO!!! ITS EPIC SO FAR! Can you plz put me in a section? Even if i get killed but only in a heroicly way like i jumped infront of awesomer, saving his life or something.
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DeadlyKratos is not online. DeadlyKratos
Joined: 02 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 3167
12 Apr 2012 09:23 PM
hi
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nahom007 is not online. nahom007
Joined: 05 Mar 2011
Total Posts: 18274
12 Apr 2012 09:25 PM
i like wij stories better.
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brickeydudeman is not online. brickeydudeman
Joined: 05 Nov 2011
Total Posts: 132
12 Apr 2012 11:53 PM
Cause your wij.
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Evelio95 is not online. Evelio95
Joined: 26 Oct 2008
Total Posts: 50982
13 Apr 2012 12:02 AM
My Cup of care \_/
Oh darn, it's empty

J
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Yo911 is not online. Yo911
Joined: 05 Mar 2009
Total Posts: 9402
13 Apr 2012 12:16 AM
I like the story, please continue.
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brickeydudeman is not online. brickeydudeman
Joined: 05 Nov 2011
Total Posts: 132
14 Apr 2012 10:05 AM
Lolz. Still, theres no story yet..................
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awesomer28 is not online. awesomer28
Joined: 23 Dec 2008
Total Posts: 7379
17 Apr 2012 08:59 PM
Thanks for putting me in
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awesomer28 is not online. awesomer28
Joined: 23 Dec 2008
Total Posts: 7379
18 Apr 2012 12:37 PM
Give us a part 2 btw



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kingzeb is not online. kingzeb
Joined: 22 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 10918
18 Apr 2012 01:06 PM
Not bad.

Win title.
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NinjaofRobloxia is not online. NinjaofRobloxia
Joined: 18 Jan 2011
Total Posts: 16770
18 Apr 2012 01:09 PM
Great, you just needed to format it a bit better. It's harder to follow a book when it's not spaced well.

Presentation is key.
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awesomer28 is not online. awesomer28
Joined: 23 Dec 2008
Total Posts: 7379
23 May 2012 09:09 PM
Part 2 please.
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awesomer28 is not online. awesomer28
Joined: 23 Dec 2008
Total Posts: 7379
05 Jul 2012 12:07 PM
Bump of oldness :c
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awesomer28 is not online. awesomer28
Joined: 23 Dec 2008
Total Posts: 7379
09 Dec 2012 01:54 PM
Bump of part 2 plox
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