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| 05 Jan 2012 06:33 AM |
Hope you enjoy. Here it goes.
Some things in this world are best not to be mentioned. Most of the time they're just said for some mother [Censored] attention. Days and days you all ways make me feel like a piece of [Censored]. You decided just walked off and leave me for the ditch.
What if I was a [Censored] like you? Going around like what, where, who? Making peoples lives a nightmare, and now they're scared to even walk out there!
Four words I have to say. Mate, your bloody [Censored]. What's the point in looking like that. It makes you look like a right [Censored].
Oh, so your offended by me, now? I think that's a all time record, pow! Your just a kid who lives under his lies. Sitting on the sofa eating full fat pies.
And what blood? Still angry at me? Oh, you just wait and see. Throw a punch at me, I dare you. But I will batter you with my Ju-Jitsu.
That was a fun rap to make :) Add any suggestions to help out :D |
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| 05 Jan 2012 04:33 PM |
Oh,here have a seat. Wanna talk about it? :o *sips tea* |
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| 05 Jan 2012 05:05 PM |
| Now you need a beat. Here, WUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUUBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB |
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| 05 Jan 2012 08:14 PM |
| @Taco. It really isn't that bad. Enjoyed the rhymes, the use of censory, and especially your lyrics. It could use 2 things however. 1- Longer raps- Instead of just 2 sentences that rhyme with the ending word, try something like maybe 4? Or 5 depending on the beat. 2- A beat. I'd be glad to hear this as a song, if it were longer. I could even supply you some lyrics. :D |
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| 05 Jan 2012 08:26 PM |
| Dude, I wanted to tell you that Jesus loves you. And NO MATTER what you'll do, He still loves you. Have a nice day. |
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| 06 Jan 2012 08:58 AM |
| @RSdragon, thanks for the tips. I will do that with further raps I may create. |
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| 06 Jan 2012 12:15 PM |
| I'm happy people liked it :) |
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| 06 Jan 2012 04:58 PM |
From a guy who listens to rap 24/7, its good. |
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djcooldog
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| Joined: 10 Mar 2011 |
| Total Posts: 25 |
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| 07 Jan 2012 10:28 AM |
| I LOVED THIS! Now all you have to do is get a beat and put it up on youtube :D |
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| 12 Jan 2012 10:07 AM |
| At least no one was horrible to say it sucked. I rather have feedback. |
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| 12 Jan 2012 02:06 PM |
I got one. Here it goes. *cough cough* You really don`t know much bout' me but sl-ts dig me, their just some mutts. This is The Wolf! Got of hoof to beat it? Take a seat and have a f--king drink! Friggin dink! (Chorus havn`t figured out :P) Yo lets start. Cause' I`ma be honest with my heart! I was born on May 25th! N@med Andrew Thomos (I`m not gonna tell my last name.) Think you got gamed? Well you are! My Dad is a insane sports guy! I haven't seen courts before but in elementary school. Beating kids cause' they f--ked with me! I was to blame. They didn't feel the same cause' my principle was a hick! A real big d-ck! (Chorus, again.) After hittin' puberty early I saw this girly b--ches named girls! So many hurls just from them! I hate them, they hate me, I`ll cook em' like a tater! slit their f---ing throats! Looked up to Em (Eminem) Everybody thought I was crazy! I`ll kick these rhymes! Yours are worth dimes (I mean the haters) Yo, f--k them. If I got luck, I`ll get money for studio time. Still have trouble with money since my childhood. I`m in my hood! See ya! (Coda) Da da, da da, da, da,
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| 12 Jan 2012 07:32 PM |
| U look up to Em, yet you rap like crap. Jeez dude, it's suppose to RHYME! |
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| 12 Jan 2012 07:34 PM |
OP as described by his own lyrics "Your just a kid who lives under his lies. Sitting on the sofa eating full fat pies." |
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| 12 Jan 2012 07:57 PM |
| 1. Who is OP? 2. People act like that phrase is a burn, I see it everywhere. It's pretty terrible tbh. |
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| 12 Jan 2012 07:59 PM |
OP= Original Poster (Thread creator i think)
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