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Re: chuck norris jokes

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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
03 Aug 2011 05:08 PM
ok post all the chuck norris jokes u can think of ill go first:
chuck norris is so pro he can multiply 0 by 0 and get 100000000 XD




NEEEEEEEEXT is
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GiantCODZombie is not online. GiantCODZombie
Joined: 09 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 113
03 Aug 2011 05:13 PM
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
03 Aug 2011 05:14 PM
chuck norris is so fast he can run around the world 10000000 times in 1 milli-second
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
03 Aug 2011 05:15 PM
when jesus was done creating the world in 7 days.... he fell asleep for 100 years after jesus went to sleep chuck norris took over
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
03 Aug 2011 05:17 PM
chuck norris went to burger king and when he was denied a lobster, he round-house kicked burger king and it turned into red lobster (resturaunt)
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
03 Aug 2011 05:17 PM
theres a chuck norris game on andkon :P
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luffy555555 is not online. luffy555555
Joined: 30 Jul 2008
Total Posts: 958
03 Aug 2011 05:22 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't go swimming, water just wants to be around him.

Chuck Norris attacks sharks when he smells them bleed.

Chuck Norris sleeps with his pillow under his gun.

Chuck Norris' fists make the speed of light wish that it was faster.
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GiantCODZombie is not online. GiantCODZombie
Joined: 09 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 113
03 Aug 2011 05:33 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norrised.
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TheBoyguest is not online. TheBoyguest
Joined: 29 Jul 2011
Total Posts: 139
03 Aug 2011 06:13 PM
Chuck Norris can do the Ryu Hurricane Kick.
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
03 Aug 2011 09:25 PM
chuck norris isnt afraid of the boogyman, the boogyman is afraid of chuck norris! ;)
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Pilot232 is not online. Pilot232
Joined: 16 Jan 2010
Total Posts: 1249
03 Aug 2011 09:53 PM
When Chuck Norris looks at a mirror, he doesn't get reflected. There is only 1 Chuck Norris.
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
04 Aug 2011 04:11 PM
superman wears chuck norris pajamas to bed XD
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
04 Aug 2011 04:15 PM
If you see Chuck Norris fighting a bear, don't help Chuck Norris, help the bear.

Chuck Norris owns the greatest Poker Face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 World Series of Poker despite him holding just a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game Uno.

Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

It is considered a great accomplishment to go down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagara Falls in a cardboard box.

Chuck Norris won a staring contest against his reflection.

The most honorable way of dying is taking a bullet for Chuck Norris. This amuses Chuck Norris because he is bulletproof.

Chuck Norris....End of story.

When Chuck Norris breaks the law, the law doesn't heal.
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
04 Aug 2011 04:17 PM
URA
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Zombie976 is not online. Zombie976
Joined: 31 Jul 2008
Total Posts: 17
04 Aug 2011 04:19 PM
ʇuǝɯɯoɔ sıɥʇ pǝʞɔıʞ ǝsnoɥpunoɹ sıɹɹou ʞɔnɥɔ
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
05 Aug 2011 09:44 PM
In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said Get a job. That is the story of the universe.

Chuck Norris Is What Willis is Talking about

He, who laughs last, laughs best. He who laughs at Chuck Norris … dies.

Chuck Norris was banned from competitive bullriding after a 1992 exhibition in San Antonio, when he rode the bull 1,346 miles from Texas to Milwaukee Wisconsin to pick up his dry cleaning.

There is no ctrl button on Chuck Norris computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Whoever said only the good die young was probably in Chuck Norriss kindergarten class.

To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris has to use a stunt double when he does crying scenes.

A picture is worth a thousand words. A Chuck Norris is worth 1 zillion words.

Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, Bang!


ZING!
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28thcentry is not online. 28thcentry
Joined: 03 Feb 2011
Total Posts: 180
05 Aug 2011 09:45 PM
who wants me to post ALOT of jokes?
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Scribbos is not online. Scribbos
Joined: 11 Mar 2010
Total Posts: 7591
06 Aug 2011 02:16 AM
Chuck Norris can drown a fish.

Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.

Voldemort used to have a normal nose. Untill he made fun of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. It's a shame he's never cried.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity....... TWICE.

Before the Bogeyman goes to sleep, he checks under his bed and in the closet to make sure Chuck Norris isn't there.

Chuck Norris has a blackbelt on the beard that he grows on his toe.

There was life on Mars..... Until Chuck Norris visited.

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LEGOTwoface38 is not online. LEGOTwoface38
Joined: 19 May 2010
Total Posts: 2639
06 Aug 2011 06:09 AM
If Chuck Norris wants an egg,he cracks the chicken.
Chuck Norris overtaken in a carousel.
Chuck Norris woke up a sleeping bag.
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LEGOTwoface38 is not online. LEGOTwoface38
Joined: 19 May 2010
Total Posts: 2639
07 Aug 2011 10:54 AM
Chuck Norris bumped this post
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neongoo51 is not online. neongoo51
Joined: 12 May 2009
Total Posts: 33061
07 Aug 2011 10:57 AM
The dinosaurs were not exterminated by a meteor, Chuck Norris exterminated them.
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Sonicfangamer2 is not online. Sonicfangamer2
Joined: 12 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 3926
07 Aug 2011 11:13 AM
Jeasus can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim in steel.
(NOTE: I am in no way breaking the rules by saying "Jeasus". I am only saying what i saw.)
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neongoo51 is not online. neongoo51
Joined: 12 May 2009
Total Posts: 33061
07 Aug 2011 11:14 AM
Chuck Norris can reflect a lazor beam with his pinky.

Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, the air flies into his mouth.

When Chuck Norris sneezes, he causes a tornado.

When Chuck Norris touches the ground, he causes an eatrhquake.

Chuck Norris can type his name 9001 times with his eyes closed and with his forehead in 1 nanosecond.
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Sonicfangamer2 is not online. Sonicfangamer2
Joined: 12 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 3926
07 Aug 2011 11:25 AM
Chuck Norris is the real reason Arnold Schwarzenegger never smiles.

Once upon a time Chuck Norris followed a sculpting lesson, resulting in what people now call Mount Rushmore.

Chuck Norris can actually describe the taste of purified water.

"An elephant never forgets" because Chuck Norris was their teacher.

The only thing written on Chuck Norris' passport is "It's me".

Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.

People say the universe was created by the Big Bang...but it was actually just Chuck Norris buying a house from God.

Chuck Norris shaves ice with his beard.

When Chuck Norris snapped his fingers he created the world, if he snaps them again he would destroy it.

Most people can die from bombs. The bombs die from Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris found Waldo...and roundhouse kicked him off the page.

Try to imagine from where Chuck Norris gets his amazing powers. He gets it from his loveley cat, which named CHUCK THE SECOND.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Dr. Dre hasn't released Detox yet...

Chuck Norris sweats molten lead. Which he then makes into bullets with his bare hands.

Chuck Norris rules majority.

Chuck Norris's iPod can hold every song in the world....on 2GB.

Chuck Norris can make the Hypnotoad do his bidding.

Chuck Norris found the hay in the needle stack.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Chuck Norris can do a handstand without using his hands.

Chuck Norris once slapped a criminal ten blocks away, giving birth to the saying "long arm of the law.".

Chuck Norris can calculate the square root of a negative number.

If you hear about someone who died and has an unknown cause of death, you can be sure that Chuck paid him a visit.

The asteroid belt was once a planet,but that's before Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it.

Chuck Norris is so fast that he can leave work at 4:30 pm and arrive home at 3:30 am on the same day.

Chuck Noris once ran around the world in 10 minutes. He spent 9 of those minutes stretching.

When Chuck Norris plays MW2 online, he gets the nuke everytime.

When Chuck Norris trims his beard he takes the hairs and throws them in the sky, this is how stars are born.
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Sonicfangamer2 is not online. Sonicfangamer2
Joined: 12 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 3926
07 Aug 2011 11:29 AM
The computer from "The Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy" took 7.5 million years to calculate the answer to life, the universe, and everything.
Chuck Norris can calculate the answer to everything beyond the universe... in 7.5 seconds.
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