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Re: The 3 Roblox Lords

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failwad is not online. failwad
Joined: 22 Jun 2011
Total Posts: 79
05 Aug 2011 07:39 PM
Book 1-Broken Shell Attacks

Chapter 1-The Speech
(The year is 2172)


The leader of Asl KingBuggie was about to give an important speech.Sweat beating down from his head right before he went to speak to his group of 5,000 memebers.He went outside to the crowd of Asl memebers.He went to say the first word and he fell down.His commanders helped him inside they didn't know if he was dead or not but they knew he was shot and they knew it was an Asl memebr because those were the only people there but what confused them was that the wound was in his back where no one was standing there.
* * *
Meanwhile Fear leader Sonic was crazed with power.He decided to ake over every group in roblox other then their ally Rat who was working with them.So Fear and Rat started to send out there troops to any group that wasn't going to surrender.This was the beginning of a huge war.
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failwad is not online. failwad
Joined: 22 Jun 2011
Total Posts: 79
05 Aug 2011 07:40 PM
He decided to take*...
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hevymetal591 is not online. hevymetal591
Joined: 03 Oct 2009
Total Posts: 8368
05 Aug 2011 07:40 PM
[ Content Deleted ]
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failwad is not online. failwad
Joined: 22 Jun 2011
Total Posts: 79
05 Aug 2011 07:41 PM
If you want to be in the story Pm me the name you want to be bye in the story your rank and what you want to do.First 10 people to tell me get in free.
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kingbuggie is not online. kingbuggie
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 3654
05 Aug 2011 08:08 PM
That was 1 sentence...use commas!

Sorry, I like commas.
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LordVade is not online. LordVade
Joined: 20 Jan 2011
Total Posts: 3108
05 Aug 2011 08:20 PM
Three lords? Pfft, more like one lord: Me.
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Masterwarrior11 is not online. Masterwarrior11
Joined: 18 Feb 2010
Total Posts: 3279
05 Aug 2011 08:20 PM
Pfft
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kingbuggie is not online. kingbuggie
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 3654
05 Aug 2011 09:05 PM
I can't wait 'till my forum book gets published. It takes up 39 pages on word, size 11 font right now.
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tiger33333321 is not online. tiger33333321
Joined: 28 Mar 2010
Total Posts: 2115
05 Aug 2011 09:05 PM
no
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cookiedude42 is not online. cookiedude42
Joined: 09 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 2158
05 Aug 2011 09:15 PM
Fail,
this was fail. Sorry
@ Lordvade
Says the dude banned for a PERVERT script
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failwad is not online. failwad
Joined: 22 Jun 2011
Total Posts: 79
05 Aug 2011 09:18 PM
Book 1-Broken Shell Attacks

Chapter 2-Low Ranks Out


All the commanders were wondering what to do next.They just got a letter from Fear and Rat saying if they don't give up their group that they are going to all die.Well they obviously denied.SO they sent all Captains and below on a ship to a safe base, while Commander Cookie took them there, with a major for help.When they were about half way there the major went to Cookie and said"Sir there's bombers on the way" Cookie replied "Well what group are they from".The major replied:There Vortex Security I guess they don't want Fear and Rat to take conrtol of the world." The only question Cookie had was why were they after Asl?

* * *

Meanwhile Fear and Rat started raiding mini groups sending a few memebers to get rid of the really small groups.Even groups that aren't war groups were sent to be destoried.Then a ice cold voice asked Sonic "Who should I target First?"."You should go kill the leader of Reign of Chaos, he's just so annoying and without a leader the group will crumble down." replied Sonic and the masked assassin left.
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YeeHawk is not online. YeeHawk
Joined: 21 May 2010
Total Posts: 4954
05 Aug 2011 09:19 PM
i saw the vid on youtube


ewwwww y must lord come bac!!1
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tiger33333321 is not online. tiger33333321
Joined: 28 Mar 2010
Total Posts: 2115
05 Aug 2011 09:23 PM
me,me,me.
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kingbuggie is not online. kingbuggie
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 3654
05 Aug 2011 09:26 PM
Suggestion: Longer, more detailed chapters.

_______________________________________

Be on the watch for the book "A rare Courage" coming to the forums soon!

Written jointly by kingbuggie and Ishinoshiro2, it will blow your minds.

Exert from "A Rare Courage" Chapter 20:

Kingbuggie stood at the border of the UEAF camp. He looked down the many hills and cliffs of the west coast of Lafayette. The ocean clashed on the cliffs and beaches. The wind pushed against him, the smell of salty air around him, and the roar of the waves below him. In the far distance you could see the lights of boats and cities through the deep fog that formed over the ocean. That was where they were headed, off into the vast world of Robloxia. He sighed. Oh how he would miss the UEAF territories in the days ahead

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silverangelics is not online. silverangelics
Joined: 27 May 2008
Total Posts: 113
05 Aug 2011 11:04 PM
:D good start
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failwad is not online. failwad
Joined: 22 Jun 2011
Total Posts: 79
06 Aug 2011 10:51 AM
Book 1-Broken Shell Attacks

Chapter 3-Into a Death Trap

The low ranks on the giant ship being taken to a safer area were about to be bombed by Vortex Securitiy, but Cookie looked out of the window and saw a island with highcliffs that were inward as waves kept hitting it but he also saw a small pair of rusty metal stairs to the top, but it was very far up.The major said Vortex was closing and so Cookie took the chance and went for the island, if everyone made it to the top the bombers would not be able to go that high and they would be safe.So they safely landed and the low ranks were escorted out and onto the island.With about 100 low ranks left they started getting bombed, and most of the low ranks were on the bottom decks.They didn't have enough time to get out and died sadly.So everyone stopped for a mement in silence for them then they moved on up the stairs with Cookie leading the way.When Cookie got about half way up the stairs he took a step and the step broke and he almost fell to his death.He managed to get back up though.So now Cookie was having a low rank that he was shifty about lead the way.About 20 minutes later the low rank said something not so smart he said "You Asl are idiots I'm a at Fear memeber I have spying on you this whole time and if you shoot me I have a bomb strapped to me so let me come with you or you all die." So Cookie thoguht and then he saw a very old step that looked like it was easily break if stepped on so he said "Ok you can continue leading." So a few seconds later the Fear memeber ended up stepping on it but he didn't fall , he saved himself just in time and said" You were trying to trcik me weren't you?" Then he pulled out his gun and shot but Cookie ducked and it hit the major.The mjor fell down dead.Everyone then started pulling out their guns but the Fear memeber said " Remeber I have a bomb on me and f you shot me we all die!" So all the Asl memebers were forced to walk witht he Fear memeber.When they got to the top they saw something tey couldn't believe.They saw the new HQ all down and ready.The problem was the Fear memebers saw it all too and had the exact coordinates of it.Then he said something into his watch and and helicopter flew down to the HQ in 10 minutes or less.No one knew what was going to happen next.
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failwad is not online. failwad
Joined: 22 Jun 2011
Total Posts: 79
15 Aug 2011 09:27 AM
Book 1-Broken Shell Attacks

Chapter 4-Fear attacks

About 20 other helicopters also came.Fear memebers started pouring out of the helicopters.They all had there guns pointed at the ASL.Well one ASL memebers shot a Fear memeber and then they all started shooting.About 2 hours later the remaining 7 ASL memebers(Cookie was one of them)
surrendered.They were taken to a jail cage in Fort Alainor.But the major problem was that the Fear were now going to attack the main HQ.Meanwhile the masked assassin made his way to Devin leader of Reign of Chaos.He pulled out a ninja star and swung it hit Devin right in the head.Devin died instantly.Reign of Chaos was furious and they attacked Fear Underwater Base.What Reigon of Chaos Didn't know was that KingBuggie actually healed and was undercover at that base.King was pretending to be in Fear he actually was a spy i Fear for a long time and was now a leader.So he went to speak to Sonic himself at the underwater base.He went into the office and they started talking.What Sonic didn't know is that King put a bomb in the office to kill Sonic.Well King then left and started to walk away when he heard a crash he thought it was the bomb but it was a missile from Reigon Of Chaos.Water poured in from the hole.King ran first to Sonic's office and locked the door.Sonic thought it was a safety thing so water wouldn't get in but it was so Sonic died from the blast of the bomb.Then King ran throguh the winding hallway with water knee high.Then the power shut off.It was pitch black.he worked his way to the elevator but thought the pwers out it won't work.But he got in it anyways.Je broke open a panel and shimmied up the rope.he made it to the top but was wandering about sonic.the power came back on and he could see into the base with the lights.The water was gone and the hole was patched.He guessed that fear was waiting for something liek that to happen.Then they unlocked Sonic's door and when he was about to go out the whole office exploded.They did get Sonic out onto normal ground though.They inspected him and saw nothing wrong really but then they saw a giant shard of glass in his back.His spine was definitly broke.They took him away in a heli and that was the last that King saw.
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cookiedude42 is not online. cookiedude42
Joined: 09 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 2158
15 Aug 2011 11:16 AM
3 things:
1: A bit unrealistic
2: You didnt put spaces after periods
3: You should say cookiedude42 since most people wouldnt know who cookie is.
Good story though
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kingbuggie is not online. kingbuggie
Joined: 13 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 3654
15 Aug 2011 03:22 PM
Honestly I think a bit more detail could still be put into it. Don't give up though, keep experiemnting and working towards your goal.
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LordWolv is not online. LordWolv
Joined: 29 Nov 2009
Total Posts: 5862
15 Aug 2011 03:25 PM
[ Content Deleted ]
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