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Re: Jailbreak Review

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jackobility is not online. jackobility
Joined: 19 Mar 2017
Total Posts: 685
06 Nov 2017 07:55 AM
I've always wanted to post something on Roblox News & Discussion, but lacking all relevant skills, except the skill of using computers a lot, I've decided to make the easiest kind of post: a review. I first played Jailbreak at a local library no one had heard of, except maybe the neighbours. It's also where I decided to do the actual "playing" part on this little review. The other parts were mostly focusing on coming up with things to criticize and trying to avoid getting yelled at by the librarians. I've played around with forum websites found from the internet and have made a dozen or so forum posts by myself. I'm by no means very good at it, but like I said, reviews are the easiest kind of post.

I'm currently working at the library I mentioned earlier. Not only because it has the gaming equipment required, an old computer and a CRT monitor that is, but also because I'm still living with my parents. My mom is quite nerdy on the inside, but reasonably normal looking with black hair and clothes that don't offend anyone. Meanwhile under his long red-dyed hair my dad is always wearing some neckbeard t-shirt no normie would ever recognize.

I've been at it for couple of days now. And as far as I'm concerned, this game is finished with the updates. All it's lacking from the average front page game is a clickbait title. Two days ago I was planning on either buying or, as my dad put it, "finding a five finger discount on" a roblox card to test out the microtransactions. I did visit the official V3rmillion site, and found something that immediately caught my interest.

The site listed a Roblox card for sale at a cheaper price, but it also listed "free Roblox hacks". From what they understood, the point was that the hacker generates some Robux and afterwards the hacker would log into my account and tweak my blurb a bit to advertise his work and give him more business. Now, I know I'm far from hackerism in any sense of the word, but my script kiddie blood was steaming.

It didn't even cost money! I was so exhilarated that I wasn't really even considering at that point how implausible it was to get Robux for such a price. So I sent a private message to the hacker and they had replied with an arrange time that was very near. I was completely on the edge, to the point of almost accidentally finding a nearby librarian's critical mass of annoyance.

Exactly at the arranged time, to the second, the download finished. I wanted to run to the monitor and hide in the bathroom at the same time. The hacker started a chat with me on Roblox and sent me a download link to an executable file, and with some hesitation I ran it. I was stunned. Where I saw a cute command prompt with funny looking symbols on it, two of my friends, Alex and Sarah, who came to see what I was so excited about saw the spitting image of Hacker Software. The black background, the white text, the ominous title, all were simply perfect. None of the free exploits usually got it anywhere near the mental image my friends had in their mind about what hacking would like on a computer screen, and this was simply it.

Before we had time to recover, we were hit with another shock. The program spit more text into the terminal. And the vague text wasn't just near what I had seen before on hacking videos, it was a perfect match.

"error: No such file or directory", it said with a smile so cute it could melt icebergs.

But this is a hacking device! It has this slightly robotic machine look to it. Sarah looked like she thinking. Smile training? Some machine training device? Do those even exist? Machine learning?? No, even a hacker wouldn't go so far.

It took us what felt like a full minute to recover. I decided to type something into the prompt and asked it to generate some robux. ## gave me a block of what seemed to be unreadable JavaScript and told me to copy and paste it into the developer console of the web browser I was using. Maybe later I could find out what else this program was capable of later with a bit of effort.

I pasted the text into the developer console, while Alex and Sarah mostly squealed with excitement and tried to hide the fact they had suddenly become very aware of their sweaty palms. I recieved my Robux, getting ready to buy some microtransactions, looking like I'd just won the lottery.

Then the librarian working the front desk, an old man who probably hated his job, shouted "I've had it with you goddamn kids!"

If our mind was like a blank paper when we saw the hacking program, now it was albino polar bear walking through arctic blizzard.

We were going to get kicked out... and we wouldn't be able to test the microtransactions.

Everyone was still smiling and looking cheerful. A loud boom from the other side of the room startled us and we witnessed the computer exploding. The librarian from the front desk was smiling and looking pretty mad at the same time while holding a shotgun and coming right towards us. Sarah started screaming.

"Holy john floren!?"

I was unable to think clearly. Should we try pleading for mercy? My eyes were wide open, I looked at Sarah, hoping she could start making some sense of this, just to see my friend's head explode from something bright yellow that hit her like a bowling ball. The carpet beneath her was now red. Alex got hit by parts of my friend's brain and started panicking.

"Whatthejohn floren whatthejohn floren, no no no."

He ran for the next room, but didn't even get to the door. Dan realized it was bullets coming from the shotgun the old man was holding. The lightning fast thing hit Michael with such a force it had no problem entering around his lower back, then traveled up to exit him through his throat. Blood was sprayed everywhere.

I was still standing there, but stumbled and my back hit the wall. I started following the wall with my hands, keeping both eyes on this... monster. He wasn't smiling anymore.

Two more shots came from the shotgun. They hit the area around my thighs and kneecaps and I screamed. I had never thought getting shot by a weapon like this would be pleasant, but my legs were being absolutely pulverized. I felt bones cracking, and even though my legs weren't restrained, I simply couldn't move them anymore.

The librarian got close enough to me and quickly shoved the barrel of the shotgun into my mouth and jammed the iron sights between my teeth. Forcing it down my throat, it locked my head in place. I had a weird flashback from a dentist. I tried to gag and struggle, but now there was practically no part of my body that was able to move anymore.

The old man lowered himself, smiling again, wrapping his fist around my neck. My nerves were almost numb at this point, but I could feel acidic burning all over in my insides where the man seemed to be firing his gun. My neck slowly started to get crushed in by immeasurable force, and I blacked out.


Overall rating: 9/10! One of the funnest games on Roblox!
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ItsSapphy is not online. ItsSapphy
Joined: 07 Dec 2012
Total Posts: 76
06 Nov 2017 07:56 AM
not an accurate review i give jailbreak 7.5 outta 10
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jackobility is not online. jackobility
Joined: 19 Mar 2017
Total Posts: 685
06 Nov 2017 07:58 AM
There's no way you read this entire review in one minute you faker.
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Sammichu is not online. Sammichu
Joined: 02 Jul 2017
Total Posts: 315
06 Nov 2017 07:59 AM
is this jimmy neutron fanfiction or a review of jailbreak?
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StephenCurry612 is online. StephenCurry612
Joined: 05 Jun 2015
Total Posts: 1075
06 Nov 2017 08:02 AM
I've always wanted to post something on Roblox News & Discussion, but lacking all relevant skills, except the skill of using computers a lot, I've decided to make the easiest kind of post: a review. I first played Jailbreak at a local library no one had heard of, except maybe the neighbours. It's also where I decided to do the actual "playing" part on this little review. The other parts were mostly focusing on coming up with things to criticize and trying to avoid getting yelled at by the librarians. I've played around with forum websites found from the internet and have made a dozen or so forum posts by myself. I'm by no means very good at it, but like I said, reviews are the easiest kind of post.

I'm currently working at the library I mentioned earlier. Not only because it has the gaming equipment required, an old computer and a CRT monitor that is, but also because I'm still living with my parents. My mom is quite nerdy on the inside, but reasonably normal looking with black hair and clothes that don't offend anyone. Meanwhile under his long red-dyed hair my dad is always wearing some neckbeard t-shirt no normie would ever recognize.

I've been at it for couple of days now. And as far as I'm concerned, this game is finished with the updates. All it's lacking from the average front page game is a clickbait title. Two days ago I was planning on either buying or, as my dad put it, "finding a five finger discount on" a roblox card to test out the microtransactions. I did visit the official V3rmillion site, and found something that immediately caught my interest.

The site listed a Roblox card for sale at a cheaper price, but it also listed "free Roblox hacks". From what they understood, the point was that the hacker generates some Robux and afterwards the hacker would log into my account and tweak my blurb a bit to advertise his work and give him more business. Now, I know I'm far from hackerism in any sense of the word, but my script kiddie blood was steaming.

It didn't even cost money! I was so exhilarated that I wasn't really even considering at that point how implausible it was to get Robux for such a price. So I sent a private message to the hacker and they had replied with an arrange time that was very near. I was completely on the edge, to the point of almost accidentally finding a nearby librarian's critical mass of annoyance.

Exactly at the arranged time, to the second, the download finished. I wanted to run to the monitor and hide in the bathroom at the same time. The hacker started a chat with me on Roblox and sent me a download link to an executable file, and with some hesitation I ran it. I was stunned. Where I saw a cute command prompt with funny looking symbols on it, two of my friends, Alex and Sarah, who came to see what I was so excited about saw the spitting image of Hacker Software. The black background, the white text, the ominous title, all were simply perfect. None of the free exploits usually got it anywhere near the mental image my friends had in their mind about what hacking would like on a computer screen, and this was simply it.

Before we had time to recover, we were hit with another shock. The program spit more text into the terminal. And the vague text wasn't just near what I had seen before on hacking videos, it was a perfect match.

"error: No such file or directory", it said with a smile so cute it could melt icebergs.

But this is a hacking device! It has this slightly robotic machine look to it. Sarah looked like she thinking. Smile training? Some machine training device? Do those even exist? Machine learning?? No, even a hacker wouldn't go so far.

It took us what felt like a full minute to recover. I decided to type something into the prompt and asked it to generate some robux. ## gave me a block of what seemed to be unreadable JavaScript and told me to copy and paste it into the developer console of the web browser I was using. Maybe later I could find out what else this program was capable of later with a bit of effort.

I pasted the text into the developer console, while Alex and Sarah mostly squealed with excitement and tried to hide the fact they had suddenly become very aware of their sweaty palms. I recieved my Robux, getting ready to buy some microtransactions, looking like I'd just won the lottery.

Then the librarian working the front desk, an old man who probably hated his job, shouted "I've had it with you goddamn kids!"

If our mind was like a blank paper when we saw the hacking program, now it was albino polar bear walking through arctic blizzard.

We were going to get kicked out... and we wouldn't be able to test the microtransactions.

Everyone was still smiling and looking cheerful. A loud boom from the other side of the room startled us and we witnessed the computer exploding. The librarian from the front desk was smiling and looking pretty mad at the same time while holding a shotgun and coming right towards us. Sarah started screaming.

"Holy john floren!?"

I was unable to think clearly. Should we try pleading for mercy? My eyes were wide open, I looked at Sarah, hoping she could start making some sense of this, just to see my friend's head explode from something bright yellow that hit her like a bowling ball. The carpet beneath her was now red. Alex got hit by parts of my friend's brain and started panicking.

"Whatthejohn floren whatthejohn floren, no no no."

He ran for the next room, but didn't even get to the door. Dan realized it was bullets coming from the shotgun the old man was holding. The lightning fast thing hit Michael with such a force it had no problem entering around his lower back, then traveled up to exit him through his throat. Blood was sprayed everywhere.

I was still standing there, but stumbled and my back hit the wall. I started following the wall with my hands, keeping both eyes on this... monster. He wasn't smiling anymore.

Two more shots came from the shotgun. They hit the area around my thighs and kneecaps and I screamed. I had never thought getting shot by a weapon like this would be pleasant, but my legs were being absolutely pulverized. I felt bones cracking, and even though my legs weren't restrained, I simply couldn't move them anymore.

The librarian got close enough to me and quickly shoved the barrel of the shotgun into my mouth and jammed the iron sights between my teeth. Forcing it down my throat, it locked my head in place. I had a weird flashback from a dentist. I tried to gag and struggle, but now there was practically no part of my body that was able to move anymore.

The old man lowered himself, smiling again, wrapping his fist around my neck. My nerves were almost numb at this point, but I could feel acidic burning all over in my insides where the man seemed to be firing his gun. My neck slowly started to get crushed in by immeasurable force, and I blacked out.


Overall rating: 9/10! One of the funnest games on Roblox!
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jackobility is not online. jackobility
Joined: 19 Mar 2017
Total Posts: 685
06 Nov 2017 08:03 AM
It's a review of Jailbreak, can't you guys read the whole review before posting jokes? I've been working on this for days.
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Sammichu is not online. Sammichu
Joined: 02 Jul 2017
Total Posts: 315
06 Nov 2017 08:04 AM
"It's a review of Jailbreak,"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?annotation_id=annotation_4068643225&feature=iv&src_vid=oHC1230OpOg&v=BLikP6BDH5w
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jackobility is not online. jackobility
Joined: 19 Mar 2017
Total Posts: 685
06 Nov 2017 08:11 AM
Come on guys this review was meant to be serious.
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AloXii is online. AloXii
Joined: 12 Sep 2014
Total Posts: 5199
06 Nov 2017 08:13 AM
This post is a little messed up
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Smash108 is not online. Smash108
Joined: 18 Jul 2014
Total Posts: 1780
06 Nov 2017 08:14 AM
thanks, you just gave me depression


#code join group to be forum expert! https://www.roblox.com/groups/group.aspx?gid=3530598
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jackobility is not online. jackobility
Joined: 19 Mar 2017
Total Posts: 685
06 Nov 2017 08:20 AM
I don't get it, why has every poster so far acted like my review is the incarnation of Satan?
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jackobility is not online. jackobility
Joined: 19 Mar 2017
Total Posts: 685
06 Nov 2017 08:46 AM
Honestly, despite all the effort I put into this the microtransactions weren't that great.
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GreenDiamond14 is online. GreenDiamond14
Joined: 19 Sep 2016
Total Posts: 78
06 Nov 2017 08:57 AM
Ok
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jackobility is not online. jackobility
Joined: 19 Mar 2017
Total Posts: 685
10 Nov 2017 09:47 AM
Bump.
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NaiaJamz is online. NaiaJamz
Joined: 18 Jan 2017
Total Posts: 279
10 Nov 2017 09:50 AM
what kind of cringey roblox fan fiction is this
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heckyeah32 is not online. heckyeah32
Joined: 07 Nov 2012
Total Posts: 1261
10 Nov 2017 09:55 AM
this took me 8 minutes to read becuase i kept screwing around, but i finished and i thought it was a good story

the jailbreak rating is off though it should be 0/10



Do it for the lols
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jackobility is not online. jackobility
Joined: 19 Mar 2017
Total Posts: 685
10 Nov 2017 11:04 AM
"i thought it was a good story"

I can see you read Jailbreak review fanfictions often.
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Nobylum is online. Nobylum
Joined: 04 Jun 2017
Total Posts: 85
10 Nov 2017 11:09 AM
I found you, faker!


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Ed1ti0nz is not online. Ed1ti0nz
Joined: 12 Feb 2017
Total Posts: 33
10 Nov 2017 11:12 AM
this is a copy pasta


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batman2w is not online. batman2w
Joined: 31 Dec 2013
Total Posts: 1039
10 Nov 2017 11:20 AM
Tell me more...
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jackobility is not online. jackobility
Joined: 19 Mar 2017
Total Posts: 685
10 Nov 2017 05:10 PM
"what kind of cringey roblox fan fiction is this"

Calling everything cringey doesn't make you look cool, kiddo, and this isn't some kind of hackathon where you can have Q&A sessions whenever. The crappiness of your post is the highest on the server. You crappost all day long on RND, kiddo. What's your deal? Do you want postcount? This subforum is supposed to be more about talk than whatever dumb memes are cool to use in RHS. You make threads wheezy, and it's really starting to affect the quality of this board. You need to fix up your crapposting habit quickly if you don't want the forum you frequent to be no more. I think the reason you're crapposting is really clear now, while you forum in one of the best sections of Roblox, you still don't feel content with being called a lowpostie. It gets to your low feelings. How could anyone call you such a rude name? I know: `cause they're aware of its effects on your little brain, and that you envy everyone with a thick postcount. As a poster of RND I think you should cease posting during hours when people are online, and I suspect you are in the part of life where you care more about talking than you care about anyone hearing you. I get the point you make in your little forum post is just an opinion, but it was platted with very little respect, and posts without respect are crapposts. It has a very edgy feel to it, as if you were trying to sound cool, but ended in an ultimate failure because nobody cares about users that are lusers. Did you even bother to check out my great review? Did you even read the first syllable of my thread? There's so little value in all those crappy threads on the front page compared to my thread, but postcounties like you wouldn't know the difference between a bait thread and a review because you can't read correctly. Go build one of your own threads, Mr. Problem. You sure know good judgement, almost as well as a ladybug. I already know what a crapthread by you would be like: "I am higher postcount den u xd." But no matter what you do, you still won't change your ways and make posts that don't suck. And if someone ever dares to mail you about how to post better, you would give them the 'ban' treatment. After realiZurnthd the complication of your issue, you won't do anything because you're bad at improving, too. You behave just like an out-of-performance 'ordinary poster' from 2016. If you disappeared from the Roblox foruming world, everyone would feel better, but there isn't any hope for that because you already don't understand how bad your case is. Have you tried solving your problem by going outside for once and playing with a ball instead? No, you haven't. You're always indoors watching anime or beating down threads on RND for being higher quality than any crappost you've ever made. Maybe go back to being an Tumblr kiddo? No way, because you 'know' how bad Tumblr is after making multiple threads related to the subject while providing no reasoning whatsoever. Lurking indoors for a long time has taught you to imitate other basement dwellers even though in the real world the only thing you have in common is that you're afraid of the sunlight. I wonder what your reply will be. Maybe 'stop le rages ugly xd.' I truly think you should give it up, and I have to tell you for real, the reasons all your posts are less than 140 characters is because your brain can't handle the tiring task of having something important to add to the conversation. Nobody needs to have your 'approval' to make a thread either. Maybe after reading my reply you'll realize that the pointless number under your avatar is not worth trashing an entire board over, but more likely than not after reading this you'll still be here whining and crapping all over people who put effort into their threads. Actually, it's probably pretty unlikely that you've even gotten past the first sentence. You failed English class, after all. I'm sure there are a few forumers who don't completely hate you as a human being, only mostly, but either way you need to give up the crappost behavior. You've exceeded the destruction of the average user by crapposting nonstop day after day. Not a lot of people who have brains would be proud of that. I now know you're completely gone because your brain wouldn't bother to read this and instead would simplify the breathtaking task of comprehension and instead only read the first 10%. I am going to give some advice to the few literate forumers who have gotten this far: posting isn't winning if all you're doing it for is postcount. Just give up the completely uncalled for crapposts which adds nothing to the conversation except the subject that you're a complete idiot who can't forum correctly and everything you say is unneeded in regular conversation and nobody wants to read your posts. Word of advice, kid: you don't look cool when you call things cringey.
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kindaostrich1 is not online. kindaostrich1
Joined: 15 Apr 2016
Total Posts: 37
10 Nov 2017 05:11 PM
you can't make a meme my dude


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kindaostrich1 is not online. kindaostrich1
Joined: 15 Apr 2016
Total Posts: 37
10 Nov 2017 05:12 PM
You must a Tumblr Mod


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androidcow1234 is not online. androidcow1234
Joined: 12 Feb 2015
Total Posts: 255
10 Nov 2017 05:14 PM
Because 1 am superior than younger players. In more ways than one. The way i act, how i communicate, my hats/clothing, my skill in building, actually understanding what roblox is about.
A b1g one is plain and simple skill, knowing how to play roblox, knowing the optimal way to move your little robloxian around, how to absolutely destroy others, etc.
Watching newer players go through obbies is hilarious, they take forever, you can tell they all play in first person and they manage to die on the simplest challenges.
Playing any combat game i almost always dominate, and i dominate HARD. Ive gotten triple digit KDR's in many games. It is normal for me to be called a hacker every single game i play because i just wreck so hard.
And its a sad gratification as a 20 year old because i know im just some weird old dude playing a kids game to make himself feel good but honestly i dont care, its great.
Plain and simple, kids suck at games. I am better than them at games because im an ol######ith a lot of experience.
22 kill streak, and this wasnt even a good one, ive done way better on Armored Patrol, this is just the one i was able to find in my recent pictures on another site


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lolcactus is online. lolcactus
Joined: 17 Oct 2014
Total Posts: 4452
10 Nov 2017 05:15 PM
Nice story.
I give the story a IO/IO but this was a bit clickbait.





milk make bone stronk
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