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Re: [RIGHT NOW] Obama Addresses Nation On Tragic Event

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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
27 Jun 2016 11:33 AM
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species1. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the “loser,” and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Greens are set aside in a Brandy Snifter, both in homage to rockers of old2, and for small amounts of self indulgence3 as the championship is underway.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3×5 card reading, “Please use this M&M for breeding purposes.”

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this “grant money.” I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

There can be only one.
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Aveeo is not online. Aveeo
Joined: 28 Apr 2012
Total Posts: 26934
27 Jun 2016 11:34 AM
This is my favorite copypasta

Respect the science!
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luckeewolf is not online. luckeewolf
Joined: 25 Jul 2013
Total Posts: 9226
27 Jun 2016 11:35 AM
I'm going to do this every time I get m&ms
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xdudesalt is not online. xdudesalt
Joined: 10 Jul 2015
Total Posts: 495
27 Jun 2016 11:36 AM
Beautiful


WE KNOW YOU'RE WISHING WE COULD GO AWAY! BUT THE INQUISITION IS HERE TO STAYYYY!
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
27 Jun 2016 11:39 AM
I'm not sure what happens when the world champion is found.
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
27 Jun 2016 11:46 AM
dropped this
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ralftrol is online. ralftrol
Joined: 08 Apr 2013
Total Posts: 8528
27 Jun 2016 11:51 AM
Quality thread
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Zeedax is not online. Zeedax
Joined: 08 Nov 2009
Total Posts: 24415
27 Jun 2016 11:53 AM
This thread is gorgeous.
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
27 Jun 2016 11:23 PM
Time for wave 2.
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SomewhatAnonymous is not online. SomewhatAnonymous
Joined: 11 Aug 2014
Total Posts: 4832
27 Jun 2016 11:26 PM
Ding ding

I'm SomewhatAnonymous to Roblox
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oxXGuideXxo is not online. oxXGuideXxo
Joined: 07 Jan 2015
Total Posts: 8053
27 Jun 2016 11:33 PM
hot
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
28 Jun 2016 10:26 PM
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
29 Jun 2016 09:09 AM
Daily Clickbat
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
30 Jun 2016 05:15 AM
Good Morning OT
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lavendeer is not online. lavendeer
Joined: 27 Apr 2013
Total Posts: 790
30 Jun 2016 05:17 AM
this just makes me want candy tbh

VAPORWAVE 焼き鳥 | death is imminent
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
05 Jul 2016 08:18 AM
Happy After-Independence Day
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
11 Jul 2016 09:47 AM
hey
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Superwarrior360 is not online. Superwarrior360
Joined: 21 Feb 2013
Total Posts: 2703
11 Jul 2016 11:13 AM
copied to my ever-growing folder of odd text files.
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Zeedax is not online. Zeedax
Joined: 08 Nov 2009
Total Posts: 24415
11 Jul 2016 01:13 PM
Lol
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Astrain1 is online. Astrain1
Joined: 27 Mar 2013
Total Posts: 18697
11 Jul 2016 01:14 PM
omg i thought i was the only one that did this


jeb get me the seperatrons
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
13 Jul 2016 04:26 PM
.
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SolarOfficial is not online. SolarOfficial
Joined: 20 May 2016
Total Posts: 239
13 Jul 2016 04:26 PM
mhm


Kirby's Pinball Land - Title Theme (1 Hour) Kirby's Pinball Land - Title Theme (1 Hour) Kirby's Pinball Land - Title Theme (1 Hour) Kirby's Pinball Land - Title Theme (1 Hour) Kirby's Pinball Land - Title Theme (1 Hour)
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Zeedax is not online. Zeedax
Joined: 08 Nov 2009
Total Posts: 24415
13 Jul 2016 06:26 PM
Orly
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SomewhatAnonymous is not online. SomewhatAnonymous
Joined: 11 Aug 2014
Total Posts: 4832
14 Jul 2016 08:59 AM
Im gonna try this
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dualroxas is not online. dualroxas
Joined: 10 Apr 2010
Total Posts: 1039
14 Jul 2016 03:40 PM
yo
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