jackhu80
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ConnorV5
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| Joined: 05 Aug 2014 |
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:15 PM |
| Im using this essay for my language arts class, thanks. Im not giving you credit |
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jackhu80
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| Joined: 11 Aug 2012 |
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:17 PM |
can someone HELP me point out my mistakes i gotta hand it in tommrrow
how many potatoes does take to fix a lightbulb |
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jackhu80
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:18 PM |
ump
how many potatoes does take to fix a lightbulb |
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gabejoss
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jackhu80
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| Joined: 11 Aug 2012 |
| Total Posts: 242 |
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:20 PM |
maaaan
how many potatoes does take to fix a lightbulb |
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jackhu80
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| Joined: 11 Aug 2012 |
| Total Posts: 242 |
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:20 PM |
POINT IT OUT
how many potatoes does take to fix a lightbulb |
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gabejoss
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| Joined: 05 Jul 2013 |
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jackhu80
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| Joined: 11 Aug 2012 |
| Total Posts: 242 |
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:22 PM |
thank you
how many potatoes does take to fix a lightbulb |
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:25 PM |
fixed all the grammatical errors:
Dragonwings Essay Should Windrider Sacrifice A Dream To Pursue Another? One pursues many things in life. Those are our dreams. They are named ‘dreams’ for a reason. A dream is something you have not already achieved or possessed. It is usually something someone's after. In a book named “DragonWings”, Windrider has to decide between 2 dreams: the dream of flight or the dream of family. He decides he has to sacrifice one for another. If you do not understand, DragonWings's about Moon Shadow, a boy who leaves his mother and grandmother in the Middle Kingdom, also known as China. He immigrates to join his father there, Windrider in the ‘Demon’s land’. They are then caught in unthinkable situations from meeting a stranger to being stuck in a earthquake. Wind rider should not sacrifice either of his dreams to achieve another that is based on his situation. Windrider should pursue both his dreams without giving up his vision of being with his wife and his mother in law. He is so close to both of his desires and it is just in reach of his hands if he just gave a single, dense push. However, he’s already pushing, you see. Windrider is saving up for his family visit here, according to chapter 7. He is also eager to protect his child; moments can be found when Black Dog was beaten and given severe injuries after his child was robbed of his money that he collected. He is not only getting close to that dream, but he is cutting close to his dream of flight. He is already in contact to the future flight pioneers- the Wright Brothers! Also, Windrider himself has already had tasted the dream. He flew in the air with his airplane for a short period of time at the end of chapter 12. Windrider is not fooling around in his spare time. He is building model airplanes according to Moon Shadow. The little push I was earlier referring to was confidence. He can do, but his spirit can not. Moon Shadow’s father can achieve both ambitions, but it does not mean you, or anyone can. Whether you can reach is all based on your situation. A situation where you cannot reach your goal is when you are a 96 year old hobo in 1776, hoping to go back in time. But a example where you can would be is if you were a 30 year old phd who graduated from a technology major in the year 3986. The only way to reach all aspirations unconditionally is to have infinite time. “Time is of the essence”. According to the text and evidence that was recently displayed, we can not undeniably conclude that Windrider’s dreams are absolutely achievable at his current situation. Unfortunately, the ability to pursue multiple dreams is impossible. The truth may be harsh but you have to accept it. |
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jackhu80
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| Joined: 11 Aug 2012 |
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:26 PM |
@negations lol what no it didnt say anything bout this in the hting
how many potatoes does take to fix a lightbulb |
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CPRAHQ
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| Joined: 26 Feb 2012 |
| Total Posts: 3511 |
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:26 PM |
ty im taking it for english >:)
There's nothing here |
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Negations
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| Joined: 09 Aug 2010 |
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Malachq
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| Joined: 09 Jun 2012 |
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| 06 Dec 2015 10:33 PM |
ok, so I started editing it and you have a lot of repetitive sentences in the first paragraph. You also are not smoothly connecting your essay as you go along.
For example:
" In a book named “DragonWings”, Windrider has to decide between 2 dreams: the dream of flight or the dream of family. He decides he has to sacrifice one for another. If you do not understand, DragonWings's about Moon Shadow, a boy who leaves his mother and grandmother in the Middle Kingdom, also known as China."
The connection of the two stories is very abrupt and reading further past this leaves the reader more confused. |
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