Dotty128
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| Joined: 09 May 2009 |
| Total Posts: 4436 |
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| 21 Jun 2015 05:17 AM |
I went out with a girl named simile.
But I don't know what I met her for.
Get it? Met her for? Metaphor?
Ugh.. That was horrible. |
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| 21 Jun 2015 05:18 AM |
i have a horrible joke:
Dotty128
le sign |
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eagle250
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| Joined: 31 Aug 2008 |
| Total Posts: 5214 |
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| 21 Jun 2015 05:18 AM |
Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he need to cross the street to continue. |
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eayIT
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| Joined: 07 Oct 2012 |
| Total Posts: 706 |
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| 21 Jun 2015 05:54 AM |
You asked for horrible jokes.. prepare yourself.. for the most awful things.. ever...
1) Why are orphans bad at playing baseball? They don't know where 'home' is.
2) Why do orphans like playing tennis? It's the only 'love' they get. 3) What's nicer than 10 babies nailed to a tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.
4) How do you get multiple babies into a bucket? Via blender. How do you get them out? Via your favorite chips.
5) What did the cannibal do after he 'dumped' his girlfriend? He wiped his butt.
6a) What's black and in the corner of your room? A baby with his finger in the power outlet.
6b) What's green and in the corner of your room? The same baby a week later.
7) What Black, White, and red all over? A penguin that was pushed down rocky hill.
8) What's funnier than a baby in a trashcan? A dead baby in a trash can. Funnier than that? 100 dead babies in a trashcan. Funnier than that? One of them is still alive? Funnier than that? He ate his way out. Funnier than that? He came back for seconds.
9) Did you hear about the successful stock selling sales-man who hanged himself with a rubber cord? He really 'went through the roof'.
10) What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume.
11) What is the difference between a baby and a onion? No one cries when you chop up the baby.
12) What is the difference between a baby and a dart-board? Dart-boards don't bleed.
13) What is the difference between a baby and a mars bar? About 500 calories.
14) Why do you put babies into blenders feet first? So you can see the expression on their faces.
15) Why did the family take the dead baby along on the cookout? So they could light it and toast their marshmallows.
16a) Why do they boil water when a baby is being born? So that if its born dead they can make soup.
16b) Why do they boil water when a baby is being born? So that if its born deformed, they can make a nice lumpy stew.
17) How do you know when a baby is dead? It doesn't cry if you nail its feet to the ceiling.
18) How do you find the live baby in a pile of dead ones? Jab 'em all with a pitchfork.
19) How do you turn a baby into a dog? Pour gas over it and light a match. "Woof"
20) How do you turn a baby into a cat? Freeze it solid, then run it through a bandsaw. "Meeow"
21a) How do you make a dead baby float? Take your foot off its head.
21b) How do you make a dead baby float? A glass of soda, and a few scoops of baby.
22) What is red and is creeping up your leg? An ######## with homesickness.
23) What is red, bubbly, and scratches at the window before exploding? A baby in a microwave.
24) What is pink and red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes.
25) 3What is black and goes up and down? A baby in a toaster.
26) What is red and hangs out of the back of a train? A ###########.
27) What is red and goes round and round? A baby in a garbage disposal.
28) What is red and swings back and forth? A baby on a meat hook.
29) What is red, screams, and goes around in circles? A baby nailed to the floor.
30) What is black and white, runs around the room, and smokes? A baby with his hair on fire.
31) What is blue and flies around the room at high speeds? A baby with a punctured lung.
32) What is cold, blue and doesn't move? A baby in your freezer.
33) What is pink, flies and squeals? A baby fired from a catapult. What do you call the baby when it lands? Free pizza.
34) What is red and has more brains than the baby you just shot? The wall behind it. *Shotgun*
35) What is more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off again.
36) What is more fun than throwing a baby off the cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork.
37) What is more fun than swinging babies around on a clothesline? Stopping them with a shovel.
38) What is more fun than shoveling dead babies off your porch? Doing it with a snow blower.
39) What bounces up and down at 100mph? A small infant tied to the back of a truck.
40) [Content Deleted]
41) What is red and pink and can't turn round in a corridor? A baby with a javelin through its throat.
42) [Content Deleted]
43) [Content Deleted]
44) [Content Deleted]
45) [Content Deleted]
46) What present do you get for a dead baby? A dead puppy.
47).Know what's 'gross'? Running over a baby with a truck. Know whats 'worse'? Skidding on it. 'Worse' than that? Peeling it off the tires.
48) What is the worst part about killing a baby? Getting blood on your clown suit.
*Sigh* Got that out of my system. This is what happens when a phychopath stays up till 6 in the morning. Not even going to go into racist jokes.. just gore jokes. Don't have anything against babies; they're just a perfect topic for horrible jokes.
I'm sorry Roblox and any moderators that see this ;-;
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eayIT
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| Joined: 07 Oct 2012 |
| Total Posts: 706 |
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| 21 Jun 2015 05:59 AM |
49) What's the most fun way to kill an obese man?
Stick your thumbs in his eyes and hang on until he's dead.
50) How do I make my favorite drink? Popping someone's eyes and drinking the juice. |
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eayIT
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| Joined: 07 Oct 2012 |
| Total Posts: 706 |
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| 21 Jun 2015 02:03 PM |
| What happens when I stay up till 6 am... |
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| 21 Jun 2015 02:19 PM |
A duck walks into a over 7-11 and says "Give me some Chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.
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| 21 Jun 2015 02:21 PM |
why did the chicken walk across the road
he didnt a black man ate him
-Confederacy will rise again please God
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LeCandy
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| Joined: 21 Nov 2012 |
| Total Posts: 24833 |
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| 21 Jun 2015 02:27 PM |
uoh
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ ★ i am a carrot ★ ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ |
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