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Re: The Story of Gaben [ Finished ]

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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
03 Jun 2015 04:38 PM
As I was browsing the store on Steam, I noticed an overwhelming amount of great games on sale; ranging from 50% to 88% off. I knew Gaben was just tempting me, and I fought the urge to empty my wallet for him. I soon found that hiding all of my hard-earned savings from Gaben is just a waste of time, so I gave up and let him take all of my funds. In exchange, I received some great deals from the Steam Summer Sale.

A few hours later, I kept hearing some odd noise emitting from the floor below me. I disregarded this constant creaking noise, mindlessly thinking that it was just my floor. Over time, the volume of this creaking noise would progress, which alerted my suspicion. Then, out of nowhere, I was hit and stunned by a blunt object, with the culprit of this being Gaben himself.

I was later awoken by the sound of clicks and clacks of Gaben's amazing mechanical keyboard. I woke up screaming; completely unaware of where I was and why I was there. "Calm down, Phil. I only have you here for an errand," said Gaben. As I started regaining my consciousness, I quickly proclaimed, "But, Gaben, my name isn't Phil!" Gaben gave me an odd look and replied, "Yes, I am quite certain that you still have a significant amount of brain damage from the previous ordeal. Your name is definitely Paul, as stated on your Steam profile."
I was suddenly very confused. "B-but.. My name is Todd!", I exclaimed. Gaben reassured me that my name was Phil, and I eventually gave up on trying to correct him. I guess I had to temporarily accept the fact that my name is Phil. Besides, maybe I do have brain damage... What the hell am I talking about, anyways?

I sat and contemplated whether my name was Phil or Todd for the next ten minutes, only to be interrupted by Gaben. "Listen, Phil, I'll need you to do something for me. Could you go outside and get me some honey bees? After this is done, you mat return to playing your brand new games in your Steam library. If you fail to comply, I'll delete your steam account. Do you understand?" I nodded and walked out of Gaben's office.

It literally took about thirty minutes just to find the elevator. A worker asked if I needed help finding anything, probably because I was cluelessly walking in circles for a half-hour. I ended up passing the elevator right after exiting Gaben's office, since it was only 20 feet from his door. That was extremely embarrassing.

I entered the elevator, which was accompanied by a man in a suit carrying a mug of coffee. He was holding a disk that read "HALF-LIFE 3 TEST DISK" on the label, written in black sharpie. He tried to hide the disk from me, as if it were the holy grail. I still had brain damage, which probably explained why I didn't make a big deal over it. Suddenly, the elevator hit a noticeable bump, which caused the man to spill his coffee all over his shirt and the Half-Life 3 disk. This resulted in him having a massive mental breakdown. The poor guy fell to the floor crying and flailing his limbs all over the place; he even pissed his pants. I don't know what triggered him to suddenly act like he was having a seizure, but I tried to exit the elevator as fast as possible ( just to make sure it didn't look like I did something wrong, of course ).

I finally arrived outside around 35 minutes after leaving Gaben's office. I started worrying that he'd delete my Steam account, since I took so long to get here. It took me a while to find a place that accompanied honey bees, until I ended up finding an area right behind the HQ where bees buzzed and a wide variety of flowers grew. I spotted a plump, yellow honey bee resting on a daffodil. With a swift move, I quickly caught it into my jar. "Phew, that was close. I thought I never would find a bee," I said.

Filled with relief, I returned back to Gaben's office, only to be scolded once again. "Phil, you caught me only one honey bee? Is this a joke?! I WANT MORE FOR MY TUBBY TOAST!" he yelled. "Y-yes sir, I'll go f-find more then," I stuttered in pure fear. I couldn't believe that he wanted more bees. Why does he even need more than one? Why can't he go get his own? Why did he even pick me?!

After twenty more minutes of catching bees, I returned to Gaben's office yet again. This time he was much more grateful. "Fantastic work, Phil! This is a perfect amount of honey bees. You may return home now."
I was ecstatic to return home, but I was curious about something. I asked him, "One last question, why did you choose me to get these bees, and not someone else?"

He told me, "Phil, you're the chosen one."
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Alysus is not online. Alysus
Joined: 01 Jan 2013
Total Posts: 5893
03 Jun 2015 04:41 PM
better than dappereevee



lasagna is spaghetti flavored cake
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adambenn is not online. adambenn
Joined: 23 Jan 2009
Total Posts: 5950
03 Jun 2015 04:41 PM
Please... Just one time.. SHUT UP!

Your constant annoyance throughout this subforum hinders my ability to function as a normal human being. The constant thought of how autistic, moronic, and poisonous you are compels me to think of ways in which the community as a whole can rid you. Whether this ridding is through roblox strictly or just in general, irl. Please, stick to making youtube videos and stay away from here.

Also this thread was a huge and utter waste of time and I feel horrible for every poor soul that decides to read this garbage. You just took away millions of brain cells from every OTer just by posting this utter nonsense.
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DENoobinator12 is not online. DENoobinator12
Joined: 24 Apr 2013
Total Posts: 2367
03 Jun 2015 04:42 PM
wat
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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
03 Jun 2015 04:42 PM
thanks for the feedback adam
i appreciate it
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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
03 Jun 2015 04:43 PM
"wat"
this is a story i made because i am completely bored
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adambenn is not online. adambenn
Joined: 23 Jan 2009
Total Posts: 5950
03 Jun 2015 04:45 PM
Yeah I'm sure you enjoyed my feedback you long face, buck toothed nose, ugly af, fatter than fat albert, pigeon toed, noncomedic, mooching, pickle hands, baby biceps, teddy bear holding, thumb sucking, bummy, half brained twit.

Next time don't even post this nonsense, stick to writing in your diary.
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DrForce is not online. DrForce
Joined: 29 Sep 2013
Total Posts: 35008
03 Jun 2015 04:46 PM
"Yeah I'm sure you enjoyed my feedback you long face, buck toothed nose, ugly af, fatter than fat albert, pigeon toed, noncomedic, mooching, pickle hands, baby biceps, teddy bear holding, thumb sucking, bummy, half brained twit.

Next time don't even post this nonsense, stick to writing in your diary. "
did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed or someting
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roniray is not online. roniray
Joined: 05 Jun 2012
Total Posts: 1682
03 Jun 2015 04:46 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRiSOMkDMX0
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samiam2001 is not online. samiam2001
Joined: 15 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 34431
03 Jun 2015 04:47 PM
@adam

heres a song i wrote for you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gd9OhYroLN0
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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
03 Jun 2015 04:48 PM
i love you too adam <3
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GammaGeek is not online. GammaGeek
Joined: 10 Aug 2014
Total Posts: 11182
03 Jun 2015 04:52 PM
I actually took the time to read this.

Reported for an inappropriate use of a pineapple.
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penguinology is not online. penguinology
Joined: 15 Aug 2010
Total Posts: 25711
03 Jun 2015 04:53 PM
Adam just misses his boyfriend, don't worry. <3

//+1 post//
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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
03 Jun 2015 04:53 PM
"I actually took the time to read this."
aw thanks
glad i didn't just take an hour to write this only for people to ignore it
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Pinkousity is not online. Pinkousity
Joined: 22 Mar 2015
Total Posts: 633
03 Jun 2015 04:54 PM
wow adam ur a mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean mean nine men men emnhsjshdjhddj person

go to your room

⋄ ⋅ ⋆ ⋇ ⋈ ⊿ ⋀ ⋁ ⋂ ⋃ ⋄ ⋅ ⋆ ⋇ ⋈ ⊿ // sweetdog3434 dead 24 hrs
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adambenn is not online. adambenn
Joined: 23 Jan 2009
Total Posts: 5950
03 Jun 2015 04:54 PM
Gammagleek I am so sorry for your loss. It'll be hard to recover those brain cells back, however, regardless of how many you've lost or will lose ever alongside every human being ever created, the total amount of brain cells lost throughout history will not even come close to the amount of brain cells, or lack there of, that OP doesn't have.
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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
03 Jun 2015 04:57 PM
bump
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GammaGeek is not online. GammaGeek
Joined: 10 Aug 2014
Total Posts: 11182
03 Jun 2015 05:09 PM
@adam

Actually, my brain cells are alright.

I got a small chuckle out of this.


Reported for an inappropriate use of a pineapple.
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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
05 Jun 2015 05:40 PM
only for ages 0-99
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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
05 Jun 2015 05:44 PM
tubby toast
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CinnabonNinja is not online. CinnabonNinja
Joined: 08 Aug 2013
Total Posts: 4933
05 Jun 2015 05:44 PM
tl;dr





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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
05 Jun 2015 05:45 PM
"tl;dr"
it's actually entertaining to read, i suggest you do so
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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
11 Jun 2015 10:57 PM
this is relevant






cuz steam summer sale
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Vineshroom is not online. Vineshroom
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 76152
17 Jun 2015 11:03 PM
ahh
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crs100 is not online. crs100
Joined: 13 Sep 2009
Total Posts: 12342
17 Jun 2015 11:07 PM
this explains why HL3 is not here
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