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drbat
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| Joined: 13 Sep 2008 |
| Total Posts: 19350 |
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| 31 Mar 2015 06:05 PM |
total score: 188,900 trade routes established: 0 hours played as Oddjob: 0 mystical totems destroyed: 0
I finished the game in 10 mins
you have elected to form a blockade around the Dreaded Pendleton using your healthy, although outnumbered, fleet of 34 vessels.
you have placed faith in your people. this is highly consistent with the principles of the Bill Belichick System.
thanks to your cunning naval tactics, you have at long last captured the Dreaded Pendleton, and after more than 2,000 years of seafaring, you now hold dominion over all the oceans of the Earth.
it has been a long journey for you and Bill alike. unless you cheated or somehow skipped ahead, you have likely invested a minimum of 750 hours playing this game.
congratulations are due for piloting the Bill Belichick Offseason Simulator to its successful conclusion. you have finished 100 percent of the game, having completed every side quest. unless, it bears repeating, you have cheated.
it is time for you to survey all that you have conquered:
Butch Jones is the real Messiah |
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FIRECAKE
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| Joined: 28 Feb 2009 |
| Total Posts: 25167 |
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| 31 Mar 2015 06:08 PM |
it is not saturday. you oughtn't have sang the Bill bed song in its entirety on a Saturday.
you have failed to adhere to the Bill Belichick system.
total score: -49 rare birds spotted: 0 taxi cabs commandeered: 0 battleships christened: 0
10/10 would play again, and i think i will |
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FIRECAKE
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| Joined: 28 Feb 2009 |
| Total Posts: 25167 |
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| 31 Mar 2015 06:13 PM |
"UNTIL THIS POINT, YOU HAVE DONE WELL. YOU HAVE SOMEHOW MANAGED TO CONDUCT SORCERY IN THE N.F.L. WITHOUT REVEALING YOUR BIRTHRIGHT AS A FOOTBALL WIZARD.
HOWEVER, YOU HAVE NOW DEMONSTRATED THE AUDACITY TO SPEND RESOURCES TO ACQUIRE A SLOT RECEIVER, RATHER THAN CRAFTING ONE YOURSELF. DOING SO VIOLATES THE SACRED LAW OF THE COLLECTIVE OF FOOTBALL WIZARDS, TO WHICH YOU ARE BEHOLDEN."
the wizard king offers you a choice:
return to your bed and start the day anew
>>>be banished to labor in the playbook mines for all of eternity<<<
it is your first day in the playbook mines.
>>>next day<<<
it is another day in the playbook mines.
next day
>>>escape<<<
it is another day in the playbook mines.
RIP Bill |
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ebenton95
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| Joined: 06 Nov 2011 |
| Total Posts: 9671 |
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| 01 Jun 2015 11:22 AM |
ur mum LOLXDDD,,,,,,
I've got to concentrate concentrate concentrate... |
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ebenton95
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| Joined: 06 Nov 2011 |
| Total Posts: 9671 |
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| 01 Jun 2015 11:27 AM |
| dood natt coole eye half an moem sow eye fidn taht REALEY ofensiv ,.,.-,./: |
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| 01 Jun 2015 11:45 AM |
Omg lol
I live in the world of baseball in the year of 2008. |
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ebenton95
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| Joined: 06 Nov 2011 |
| Total Posts: 9671 |
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| 03 Nov 2015 04:02 PM |
| i will not stop until i beat it |
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| 03 Nov 2015 04:27 PM |
| i will be back in 650 weeks |
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FIRECAKE
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| Joined: 28 Feb 2009 |
| Total Posts: 25167 |
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| 23 Nov 2015 07:44 PM |
| i am going to finish it for real |
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FIRECAKE
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| Joined: 28 Feb 2009 |
| Total Posts: 25167 |
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| 23 Nov 2015 07:47 PM |
http://www.sbnation.com/2015/3/31/7979801/bill-belichick-offseason-simulator
original link |
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FIRECAKE
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| Joined: 28 Feb 2009 |
| Total Posts: 25167 |
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| 23 Nov 2015 07:49 PM |
i wandered around in a hardware store for too long and died of hydration
"due to safety concerns, the Bill Belichick Offseason Simulator has been terminated. the importance of staying hydrated is one of the chief tenants of the Bill Belichick system.
to recap, you just played a video game about shopping at a hardware store for a doorknob and you basically died. in the future, rather than a video game, perhaps a movie, book, or squeaky horn is more your speed.
you have failed to abide by the principles of the Bill Belichick system.
total score: 6,670 wretches accosted: 0 camp sites looted: 0 credit earned at dispensary: 0 euros" |
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FIRECAKE
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| Joined: 28 Feb 2009 |
| Total Posts: 25167 |
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| 23 Nov 2015 07:58 PM |
i fought a rock band and used the wrong weapon and died
"the Klobb has sprouted into flagpole, and as it blossoms, a white surrender flag emerges. it continues to grow at rates unprecedented, until it is plainly visible from space.
extraterrestrials have long observed Earth. upon witnessing this unmistakable concession of defeat, they capitalize on the opportunity by incinerating the entire planet.
the human race is now extinct. no one in this interstellar soup will preserve our history. no one cares. and if no one remembers us, we effectively never were. i never happened, and you never happened. death is easy. the truest Hell is to never have existed at all.
you have failed to abide by the principles of the Bill Belichick system. you have lost.
GAME OVER
total score: -366,075,920 wormholes monetized: 0 speed attained in fanboat: 0 knots fanboats pirated: 0" |
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FIRECAKE
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| Joined: 28 Feb 2009 |
| Total Posts: 25167 |
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| 23 Nov 2015 08:02 PM |
reclaimed the Atlantic ocean
i am victorious |
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| 04 Dec 2015 09:13 PM |
| 750 hours later, i have finally completed the Bill Belichick Offseason Simulator. what an honor |
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