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Re: Guide to making a hockey team in Finland

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SRHL is not online. SRHL
Joined: 10 May 2010
Total Posts: 13484
13 Oct 2014 09:20 PM
1) Your team name must be 7 letters long or less unless you are using two Finnish words as a name (the only exceptions are Red Ducks and Los Bombers)

2) Your team name must also sound stupid (or even vulgar) to English-speakers

3) Your jersey must have a minimum of 10 sponsors regardless of what league you play in

4) Build a 500-seat arena as your first home ice to fit your 40 fans, most of which are the friends and relatives of your players

5) Put sponsors all over the ice, boards, and arena walls so that you have enough money to buy a half-broken zamboni while maintaining your arena and team

6) Start building your team. Take 10-15 locals aged fifteen to twenty-five as the first 10-15 members of your team, then acquire 5-10 people from other cities (preferrably rejects from at least the 3rd tier), and if you can afford it, one player from any random ass foreign country you can think of (Mexico has been done before)

7) Buy 3 new helmets when you realize that 3 of your players' heads are too large to fit in them

8) Start playing in III-divisioona (the 5th tier)

9) Have fun getting bullied by teams such as Akaan Kiekko (who play their home games in a railway station) and TarU (who play in the town of Tarvasjoki, population 1950)

10) Never get promoted because the winners are always the teams who got relegated from II-divisioona or the five teams that were in III-divisioona to begin with who are somehow able to beat them
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XJeffXNeroXPPV1 is not online. XJeffXNeroXPPV1
Joined: 03 Nov 2010
Total Posts: 11250
13 Oct 2014 09:28 PM
My favorite team in Liiga is Espoo Blues only because Lars Volden played on the Blues.
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AnimatedDannyo is not online. AnimatedDannyo
Joined: 28 Mar 2011
Total Posts: 18336
13 Oct 2014 09:29 PM
This is gold.

ᗩᘉᓰᗰᗩ☂ᕮↁᗪᗩᘉᘉϒ〇
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SRHL is not online. SRHL
Joined: 10 May 2010
Total Posts: 13484
14 Oct 2014 07:28 PM
BONUS: You somehow manage to get a place in Liiga after several decades and your star players immediately leave for the KHL
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SRHL is not online. SRHL
Joined: 10 May 2010
Total Posts: 13484
05 Dec 2014 03:23 PM
BONUS 2: In 2024, you sign a 60-year-old Raimo Helminen as a publicity stunt. The newspapers talk about it for weeks and immediately stop after he plays one game and quits.
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SRHL is not online. SRHL
Joined: 10 May 2010
Total Posts: 13484
17 Feb 2015 06:44 AM
BONUS 3: You sign a player who speaks Swedish as his first language and he ends up getting a major penalty and a game misconduct after less than 10 games. Have fun dealing with the insane amounts of hate from the entire Finnish hockey fanbase.
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AnimatedDannyo is not online. AnimatedDannyo
Joined: 28 Mar 2011
Total Posts: 18336
17 Feb 2015 05:19 PM
Still gold.

ᗩᘉᓰᗰᗩ☂ᕮↁᗪᗩᘉᘉϒ〇
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Spai1 is online. Spai1
Joined: 24 Aug 2012
Total Posts: 2964
17 Feb 2015 06:14 PM
hot
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NUKE169 is not online. NUKE169
Joined: 09 Sep 2010
Total Posts: 16600
17 Feb 2015 06:28 PM
Here is my team:

HKR Seinäjoki
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SRHL is not online. SRHL
Joined: 10 May 2010
Total Posts: 13484
02 Jun 2015 09:46 PM
BONUS 4: You're a team in Mestis (2nd tier) and there's an expansion for Liiga next season (or an opening for some other reason). You are one of the top teams in Mestis, but there's one team that's way ahead of you in 1st place. The other team is given the new spot in Liiga under the assumption that they'll win the Mestis. Said team then ends up choking away the regular season title and is eliminated in the first round of the playoffs, while you go on to win the Mestis title. Your board and fans immediately cry to the governing board of Finnish hockey to give your team a spot, and they create an expansion spot for you 2 seasons later because you won't shut up.
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