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Re: The defense of Hardagoom

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soardlo is not online. soardlo
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Total Posts: 19593
02 Sep 2014 09:54 AM
The defense of Hardagoom

Part 1

 

                The icy mist of the morning covered the ground outside the mountain fortress of Hardagoom, the black obsidian walls dripping from the dew as inside the walls the soldiers milled about, preparing for their daily duties.  The watchmen atop the wall shifted from their duties, the nights men returning to the barracks for their rest while the day men entered the towers, watching over the land. As the soldiers went about their duties and jobs a lonely raven flew, clearing the walls easily as it entered the main stronghold, taking roost, a small scroll attached to its leg.

“Mhm…a raven? Odd, the next wasn’t due for some time…” The roost keeper, a quaint little man by the name of Raviel, muttered, retrieving the scroll from the raven’s leg and undoing it, holding it in one hand as he sipped from a cup of tea in another. The silence in the roost room grew almost deafening as the man continued to read the scroll, only to be broken by the shattering of his mug as it slipped from his fingers. “Oh dear oh dear, this needs to be reported at once…” he muttered, his tone of voice revealing the graveness of the scroll as he turned, exiting the roost and quickly descending the stairs. The little man moved as quickly as his feet could carry him towards the general’s quarters, beating on the door loudly as he neared, “General Dravor! General Dravor, urgent news from the west!!” He called through the door.

“What is it Raviel!” The general asked angrily, opening the door only to quickly step to the side as Raviel nearly ran him over, “Close the door!” Raviel called, his voice making his urgency and worry evident. Dravor quickly did, catching on his urgency, “What is it Raviel?” Dravor asked quickly.

“News from the west sir, a large amount of Arandor Soldiers are moving this way! They seek to take the fortress for a foothold into Barinthia! They will arrive far before we can be reinforced!” Raviel said quickly, barely taking a breath throughout what he said.

“What?!” Dravor growled,  the news catching him completely by surprise, “How many days till they arrive?!” He asked loudly.

“Four days sir!” Raviel said, rereading the scroll.

“Waste no time Raviel, rush to the southern tower and ring the warning bell, we must prepare!” Dravor growled, moving to his wardrobe to retrieve his armor and weaponry, “Send the sergeants to the war room at once!” He shouted to Raviels back as he rushed out the door.

And miles away, as this meeting occurred, the army of Arandor marched, bound for Stronghold Hardagoom.
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soardlo is not online. soardlo
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Total Posts: 19593
02 Sep 2014 03:07 PM
I hate trying to post on mobile
Like I literally took half an hour to get this to post via copy and paste from my email...

No that was some other guy. 'Shit Sherlock', first name 'No'.
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soardlo is not online. soardlo
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Total Posts: 19593
02 Sep 2014 03:26 PM
bump

Would love to hear what people thought of this

I had to write it for school for some free write thing

So Imma add a part each time

Tis gonna be good

No that was some other guy. 'Shit Sherlock', first name 'No'.
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soardlo is not online. soardlo
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Total Posts: 19593
02 Sep 2014 07:14 PM
Might make an account on wattapad and put this there.

Could maybe possibly probably get opinions there.

Y'alls unresponsive.

No that was some other guy. 'Shit Sherlock', first name 'No'.
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MrVincent is not online. MrVincent
Joined: 10 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 2553
02 Sep 2014 07:14 PM
tl;dr

insert lenny face here
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soardlo is not online. soardlo
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Total Posts: 19593
02 Sep 2014 07:16 PM
tl;dr = Piss off.

No that was some other guy. 'Shit Sherlock', first name 'No'.
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MrVincent is not online. MrVincent
Joined: 10 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 2553
02 Sep 2014 07:16 PM
wait

this is your thread

why would i tell you to piss off your own thread

insert lenny face here
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soardlo is not online. soardlo
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Total Posts: 19593
02 Sep 2014 07:17 PM
No it means if you aren't actually gonna read my work then piss off.

No that was some other guy. 'Shit Sherlock', first name 'No'.
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EpicBoyMike is not online. EpicBoyMike
Joined: 25 Dec 2011
Total Posts: 5037
02 Sep 2014 07:18 PM
tl;dr
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RAE181 is not online. RAE181
Joined: 05 Sep 2009
Total Posts: 2226
02 Sep 2014 07:20 PM
I like where this is going, if my opinion even counts as a thing..
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soardlo is not online. soardlo
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Total Posts: 19593
02 Sep 2014 07:21 PM
@Rae

heheheheh

It's gonna go south

BLood and gore and stuff

and I'm giving it to my teacher

hehehehehhehe

No that was some other guy. 'Shit Sherlock', first name 'No'.
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AlphaX10 is not online. AlphaX10
Joined: 13 Jun 2008
Total Posts: 7671
02 Sep 2014 07:24 PM
needs interesting characters and elaboration on their backgrounds in later parts
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BilICipher is not online. BilICipher
Joined: 27 Jul 2014
Total Posts: 1510
02 Sep 2014 07:27 PM
alpha finally posted instead of lurking wowe

spooky scary skeletons
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soardlo is not online. soardlo
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Total Posts: 19593
02 Sep 2014 07:27 PM
I intend to build characters as I go, it's in full third person so yea.

Can't really go into a characters mind and describe myself.

No that was some other guy. 'Shit Sherlock', first name 'No'.
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