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| 12 Aug 2014 10:37 PM |
(Hey, I wrote this earlier. Critique it, something is very wrong with it.
And I'm perfectly aware that this'll be filled with troll comments.
I'm gonna hope most of you are serious.)
--------------------[BACKSTORY]--------------------
The Future.
How so many can think of it so differently is a puzzle in itself.
Some believe the future will lead to a utopia for all mankind, while others see nothing but death and destruction for the Earth.
Sad that both groups were right.
In 2103, there was two different 'sides' of the Earth.
The East was a scientific haven, with scientists from all the different Sciences flocking to the land to research projects for the betterment of mankind. As technology advanced, so did the East. Eastern cities became beautiful utopias, where nature and technology blended together to create the perfect society. Pristine water flowed through the Waterways, and skyscrapers seemed to almost grow from the streets. Power was generated by the Core Plant, a generator designed to last two-hundred years without repair or replacement. Life was good for the Easterners.
The West was never as lovely. With technology only advancing in the East, the West was left to their own devices. As the East grew and thrived, the West barely held on to life. The only industry the West was able to create, was to make the parts for the utopian cities in the East, and shipping them to the East. Poverty and crime flooded the streets of Western cities, and government was nearly nonexist. Westerners heard news of the East growing, and became spiteful. They became organized, dedicating their lives to a single purpose: The destruction of the East. Western armies began to mobilize in 2117, attacking and destroying Eastern cities, who were unprepared for any kind of attack from the West. Dozens of utopias fell to the armies of the West, until the East began a counterattack.
Although individual cities in the East were unprotected, Eastern government had prepared for a Western uprising. Each member of the Eastern Council had agreed that if the West attacked, they would have a weapon to end any resistance. Permanantly.
On November 8th, 2117, Eastern cities awoke to find Western raids had stopped completely, overnight. Government officials claimed that Western troops had given up and gone home, but most citizens knew the truth. The West had been obliterated, the land terraformed into a wasteland, and the people mutated into shells of their former selves. Life went on in the East, the people ignoring the abomination that their land had created.
It has been one-hundred years since the destruction of the West, and the East is finally beginning to feel the consequences.
--------------------[PLOT]--------------------
The Core Plant has begun to fail. As the only source of power for the East, it's failure would be catastrophic towards the civilization that had taken so long to build and perfect. The new Eastern Council has elected to assemble a team to travel into the ruins of the West. Each member is specially selected from a pool of potential participants, and sent a letter. The letter is as follows:
[NAME OF PARTICIPANT],
The Council has selected you to partake on a special mission into the long-destroyed West. As you know, the West destroyed themselves one-hundred years ago by embracing the ways of war over the ways of science. However, when the West died, several pieces of important technology were buried along with it. One such technology was the power core that was designed for use in the Core Plant that fuels life as we know it. As this letter has stated, you will be sent into the West to retrieve the designs for the power core.
The success of this mission will lead to the East having unlimited power, as we would be able to build new cores for the Core Plant. You will also earn a large amount of funds, and recognition by the Council as a hero. However, success of the mission will require your cooperation with other members. Attached below is a form that you must fill out.
You will be provided with the gear required to finish the mission in Seaport City, at the town hall. You are to arrive there at no later than eleven o'clock PM on Tuesday. You will find private transport to Seaport at your local town hall.
The Council is happy for your cooperation.
-W
--------------------RULES--------------------
1: No godmodding, power-playing, or meta-gaming.
2: Swearing and romance are done at your own risk. Minor forum romance only.
3: Obey the OP and any admins that are assigned.
4: Wait to be accepted to begin.
5: Your character must be useful to a team in some way. Skills should not be 'Runs fast' or 'Can draw', or anything like that.
6: Your character should not have military training, as the East has been peaceful for 100 years. Some experience with guns at the very most.
7: Put "Paradise Lost" in the Other section of your CS.
--------------------CHARACTER SHEET--------------------
Name:
Age (18-35):
Gender:
Apperance:
Personality:
Biography (Optional):
Skills:
Weapon of Choice (Modern-Semi-Futuristic):
Other: |
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| 12 Aug 2014 10:47 PM |
Name: General Dornan
Age (18-35): 34
Gender: Male
Apperance: An old man with scars
Personality: An old man with scars
Skills: Slamming people to death with a suit of armor
Weapon of Choice (Modern-Semi-Futuristic): A suit of armor
Other: Paradise GAINED?!?!?!?!? |
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| 12 Aug 2014 10:50 PM |
Somehow I knew you'd be the first one to post.
I was expecting so many more hating comments though.
I mean, I basically asked for them. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 10:56 PM |
Being serious, i do see a problem (there's probably a million more) in the whole west trading with the east bit.
Why the hell would they make parts and tools for what they probably think of as 'evil overlords' and would the eastern people even want to touch the parts knowing that the western people put their 'dirty disguisting begger' hands on the parts? |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:00 PM |
The East never even thought about who made the parts, they just used them.
The West was spiteful towards the East, but they never got out of hand until they began to attack. Also, like it says (somewhere), building parts for the East was some of the only work available. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:01 PM |
"The East never even thought about who made the parts, they just used them."
I'm pretty sure a bunch of scientists and general intelligent people would start to wonder where the parts came from. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:05 PM |
I tried to make it seem like the East was generally ignoring the West.
Which is why the West had so much poverty in the first place.
Which led up to the manufacturing of parts for the East.
Which led to spite.
Which led to war.
Which led to what wiped out the West.
...Does that work? |
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Cyantic
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| Joined: 21 May 2014 |
| Total Posts: 4073 |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:06 PM |
Probably because they couldn't be assed to make their own factories.
Seems alright to me. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:10 PM |
| I'm still almost certain that a scientist, or even just a common person that have only seen one or two factorys ever mentioned or heard of (the power plant and water processing plants) would at least wonder where the parts were coming from. |
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Tikobe
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| Joined: 12 Aug 2011 |
| Total Posts: 6366 |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:11 PM |
I'm no big shot on Sci Fi, but there is a bit of a problem. The fact that the whole planet was divided in dump and technological wonder makes no sense.
Now, contrary to what mario said, it makes sense that the West produced the parts. In an effort to make efficient trading, one would try to find, and perfect, something that would be of value to someone else. Logically, despite the dump status I just labeled it, the West would go and make parts that while they had no value to their underdeveloped society, would be immensely helpful to the East, who were probably busy with risks, and innovations, and all those fancy things scientists do.
I congratulate you on that.
However, the West wouldn't have been a dump. They were in close proximity to the East, they got the superior parts that the East would need, but they would want schematics and such in return. This would've made the West in a better state.
Second of all, it's too large. If this is divided half East, and half West, then the East and West would've developed more cultures and not be two unified slices of Earth pie. This is demonstrated by the Roman Empire, which fell because it was so large. And they only had the Mediterranean Sea!
Now, despite this flaw in logic, I can see this would be a decent, if not good, RP, and I congratulate you sir, for making it! |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:13 PM |
| Well, they knew, they just didn't care. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:15 PM |
Sorry, that was @mario
i left the page and forgot to post that |
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Tikobe
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| Joined: 12 Aug 2011 |
| Total Posts: 6366 |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:16 PM |
| Don't worry. I could tell. ;) |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:18 PM |
"Well, they knew, they just didn't care." They would of probably been xenophobic about the west since they lived one or two generations away from them, so i don't see them not caring that dirty disguisting peasant hands touched all the machine parts.
It would make more sense if the eastern people were lied to about where the parts came from, and instead were told a giant factory which is actually completely empty where 'robots' built the parts would make more sense. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:19 PM |
| Didn't mean to say "would make more sense" two times. |
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Cyantic
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| Joined: 21 May 2014 |
| Total Posts: 4073 |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:21 PM |
Honestly, I doubt that.
You could probably get in much cheaper and not waste population or space by asking the west to do it. I don't see why they'd turn up their nose at that offer. Sure, in the long run, it might start to slowly get more expensive, but for a short to medium term it would be much cheaper. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:24 PM |
| Cyan hit the nail over the head. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:26 PM |
"You could probably get in much cheaper and not waste population or space by asking the west to do it. I don't see why they'd turn up their nose at that offer. Sure, in the long run, it might start to slowly get more expensive, but for a short to medium term it would be much cheaper."
Sorry, are you saying that the people in the east wouldn't xenophobic of the west, and much less be scared that their parts come from the dirty, disease, crime filled west?
No. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:27 PM |
I really don't think they'd care, mario.
Besides, it's my world.
My rules
>:3 |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:29 PM |
"Besides, it's my world.
My rules"
Why go and ask whats wrong with it if you're just gonna say "my ruls!" then? |
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Cyantic
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| Joined: 21 May 2014 |
| Total Posts: 4073 |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:29 PM |
Economics doesn't give a shift about it.
I don't see why anyone cares about it. Hell, you know all the bad propaganda against Cuba, but America still gets things from it.
Same with China, for real world examples. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:31 PM |
Mario has re-entered the trollzone.
And yeah, if they care so much (which they wouldn't) why don't they
i dunno
spray them with a hose
throw soap at them
something like that |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:36 PM |
"Economics doesn't give a crap about it.
I don't see why anyone cares about it. Hell, you know all the bad propaganda against Cuba, but America still gets things from it.
Same with China, for real world examples."
I'm pretty sure it doesn't work the same when both sides are raised and also blocked off from eachother to think the other side is evil and disguisting/greedy for three or two generations.
Unless the east is being run by people from the west and the west is being run by people from the east it won't make any sense.
Also, good to see that ninja has goes back into the "uh oh loks liek i losed arguement better cal a trol!" side. |
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Cyantic
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| Joined: 21 May 2014 |
| Total Posts: 4073 |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:47 PM |
I'm pretty sure what you just said makes absolutely no sense.
Imagine the west as China/Cuba.
Imagine the east as America. It works just fine. |
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| 12 Aug 2014 11:49 PM |
"Imagine the west as China/Cuba.
Imagine the east as America. It works just fine."
I say again, I'm pretty sure it doesn't work the same when both sides are raised and also blocked off from eachother to think the other side is evil and disguisting/greedy for three or two generations. |
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