NBA157
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| Joined: 09 Apr 2012 |
| Total Posts: 17263 |
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| 19 Apr 2014 05:57 PM |
hes hilarious, saw him today. funniest guy i know.
"hide n seek champion 2014 he malaysian airlines jet"
"so im camping, and this guy's camp is a broken old trailer, yeah, welcome to camp. they have running water that comes from a well, and we can wash our faces with it but we can't drink it. then we find a dead raccoon in the damn well! i can wash my face with raccoon water? and it was deep, can't get it out of there so we're washing our damn faces with decomposing raccoon water! i wouldn't was my dog in that, dammit!"
"yeah so sean martin (his son) comes home for the week and each year i get quarters and i put them in a gatorade bottle for him, and he counts it and uses it at the landromat and then he tells me the people at the washers place count it for him, and i ask him if they're chinese and he's like yeah. like HOW DID I KNOW THEY WERE CHINESE? like now that you dont count it im not doing it anymore. and then i begin thinking about what its like to have chinese people washing your shorts. like 'oh u had a stain dere but i got it out'. and then you walk in and they point at you and talk about you in their foreign tongue and giggle like 'chen waan teh teehee' at ya, like who would do that? even laundromats are bad, like what crap was in there, but to have a chinese stranger washing your clothes? yeah, right, of course. sounds fun."
"so lisa gets sick so i'm going to get some ginger ale to settle her stomach and its raining hard, and i see this guy saying 'help help' and he's stuck in a dumpster and can't get out. says he jumped in last night and has been stranded and crap. i go to help him but i see right through his plan, yeah help the poor drunk guy out of the dumpster and the two guys hit me over the head and rob me and i'm hesitating and then i decide to help him, but i'm not gonna touch him! come on, who knows what business is in there and crap. i give him a crate to step on and then he's like 'thanks man that helped' and im like yeah yeah and drive away. i went to a carwash after he touched it, you know what stores use that dumpster? a furnace store, the convenience store, and a dog grooming place. no, no, and no. its a high jump, if he was drunk he couldnt have made it, so what made him jump in a dumpster? was a mountain lion chasing him down? a gang? i'd rather take a few punches than play with the dog hair and banana peels! then i think something might be up, so i go to the police station and i'm waiting and i begin jumping up and down saying 'HELLO HELLOOOO' because they're so busy on sunday morning at 8 am, and i tell him the whole story and when i tell him about the crime thing about the robbery he rolls out of his office on the swivel chair laughing he's like 'good one man'. like he could be a criminal! and then i didnt even get the damn ginger ale." |
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| 19 Apr 2014 05:57 PM |
Lier
Kevin hart is funniest man alive.
Lier. |
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CatGuyz
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| Joined: 24 Apr 2011 |
| Total Posts: 12404 |
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| 19 Apr 2014 05:58 PM |
welcome back nba
post.exe has stopped responding |
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Cizox
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| Joined: 25 Dec 2009 |
| Total Posts: 42220 |
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| 19 Apr 2014 05:58 PM |
| the funniest man alive is louis ck ok |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:00 PM |
>"and then i didnt even get the damn ginger ale."
lol |
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NBA157
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| Joined: 09 Apr 2012 |
| Total Posts: 17263 |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:01 PM |
he told us some stories about the water in indiana. like when he turned the faucet on to brush his teeth and it smelled worse than anything else in the bathroom, so my cousin sees him brushing his teeth with b33r because he won't drink that crap.
or about how they turned on a faucet a different year and green, rusty, stinky water came out so they call the maintenance guy. he comes in, cups the water in his hand, drinks it, and says "tastes fine to me" and that was it and walked out. |
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NBA157
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| Joined: 09 Apr 2012 |
| Total Posts: 17263 |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:01 PM |
@boog, kevin hart and will ferrell are tied for second |
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NBA157
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| Joined: 09 Apr 2012 |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:03 PM |
| bak in mai dai water didnt exist |
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NBA157
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| Joined: 09 Apr 2012 |
| Total Posts: 17263 |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:04 PM |
did anyone see blake griffin dump his water on that gsw fan when he made fun of him lold |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:05 PM |
| did you see when darren collison and the refs cost the clippers game 1 lololol |
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NBA157
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| Joined: 09 Apr 2012 |
| Total Posts: 17263 |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:07 PM |
lol, yeah was watching. and when they missed that call on paul they're not allowed to change fouls, just possession, so they could do nothing and then gave it to gsw. that was what cost them the game, collison almost won the game but stepped out. |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:07 PM |
Clippers just lost.
Im sorry for bieng a spoiler.
I saw the live game...
On the TV it says
"LIVE"
It lies..
CP3 lost the game for clippers And blake griffen got fouled out.
Sorry for spoiling... |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:07 PM |
NVM....forget my last post.
lmfao. |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:08 PM |
lol collison made too many mistakes in that game
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NBA157
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| Joined: 09 Apr 2012 |
| Total Posts: 17263 |
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| 19 Apr 2014 06:10 PM |
| yeah, that cost him. plus paul and griffin both had foul trouble. griffin played 19 minutes, and fouled out. paul had foul trouble. but igoudala also fouled out. |
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NBA157
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| Joined: 09 Apr 2012 |
| Total Posts: 17263 |
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