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Im on my relapse freestyle {Diss to Idestroy and Hurricane)

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keyyon is not online. keyyon
Joined: 15 Jul 2010
Total Posts: 1296
02 Jan 2014 08:20 AM
Yo... *chikka* Shady's Back.. I said *chikka* Shady's Black.. I said *chikka* Guess who back.
It feels so good to be back im on my relapse {WROSTER THAN BEFORE}

-Verse 1-
Why am i in prison i just awoken,and why the fk am i over here chokin, the officer mr. Oakin
hes just sitting there getting choked, for me to choke him i must have been provoked..
i already have life sentenece in this jail, im with Dirty Dan i cant pay my bail, im stuck in this bloody cell...

so i have to change the pace escape this place without leaving a trace cause i hung the officer with a shoe lace and i took his hand cuffs and slashed his face, its only a race of time.. before the government finds out
wut i did this time.. they will ship me to europe for this crime..

But its not my fault that i woke up killin him, then i was afraid cause i was in the same cell with dan
i dont remember anything but i went to this club they told me to go on stage and sing stan
i told these people that im not eminem {IM NOT EMINEM} cause im way blacker that eminem
they told me my name is shady.. and they want me to perform stan for the 1st Lady..
and that the usa is counting on me... they told me to go and put on something fancy, but i aint doin this for the holy grace of god i need to find my fkin invisible escape pod..

-Verse 2-
I ran into the kitchen and ate me some chicken then got chased out the room with cheifs with knives and maids carrying brooms, i just wanted to smoedkwahd some mushrooms but it seems like i already took a value, cause now my vision getting all blurry, and they're pushing me on stage tellin me to hurry, i collapse harder than Stephan McCurry ...getting fouled by LeBron James in a flash, the next thing i remember is being in a car crash, i was blinded and all i heard was smashes and crashes and some camera flashes
i dont remember anything much but i know that my hair is still black
so for this very moment im overdosin on the skills that i lack
IM BACK so im making every other rapper start to ack....

@Idestroy your rhymes are getting chessy, your mistaken if you think ill let you off easy
saying that i should fkin retire, dude your not a real rapper your not even hired,
your rhymes are making me Re-TRIED get it your rhymes are so lame they're making
me tried. Cause ill still be a rapper if all my labels unsigned me and they told me to leave cause im fired
i would still make these stupid songs, and here take this back its your mothers th0n.g... C'mon...

Now to the little hurricane who thought he was so big and bad
the truth is this guy isnt hardcore he just misses his dad
hes a talkin bout he black.. {SHEET} he raps like a wangster, a white lad
Im doing this relapse freestyle just to get yall all mad!
so tell me something hurricane or black dog
why are you dirtier than the ground hog?
If your the hurricane bish im the black fog, the blackest mist no man or pokeMAN can defog
Cause if your no king so you can say hi to the finger
your be better off being a king at being a fail singer
cause if your the king then fk it im a god
and ill stick your head on my godly rod..


So everyone get up cu.m on and dance to my dance sung c'mun.... RELAPSE... HAHAHAHA
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keyyon is not online. keyyon
Joined: 15 Jul 2010
Total Posts: 1296
02 Jan 2014 08:56 AM
comments? Rates?
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nicolita is not online. nicolita
Joined: 25 Jul 2009
Total Posts: 393
02 Jan 2014 11:15 AM
O_o
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keyyon is not online. keyyon
Joined: 15 Jul 2010
Total Posts: 1296
02 Jan 2014 11:48 AM
Its that bad..
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PenBlade is not online. PenBlade
Joined: 27 Dec 2012
Total Posts: 1633
02 Jan 2014 12:05 PM
It's pretty bad, bro. It was like a big jumble.

I suggest really working on your rhyme scheme first off. It seemed like you were rhyming line by line rather than bar by bar. Keep practicing.
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kittylicious2885533 is not online. kittylicious2885533
Joined: 18 Jul 2013
Total Posts: 281
02 Jan 2014 01:07 PM
Wtf....
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IDestroyRobloxians is not online. IDestroyRobloxians
Joined: 17 Aug 2013
Total Posts: 55
02 Jan 2014 01:24 PM
Keyyon And I ddint diss u....
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keyyon is not online. keyyon
Joined: 15 Jul 2010
Total Posts: 1296
02 Jan 2014 01:47 PM
IK you didnt diss keyyon.. you INSULTED BLack shady and my relapse.... so you will feel the flame.
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Thehotwildfire is not online. Thehotwildfire
Joined: 08 Sep 2011
Total Posts: 265
02 Jan 2014 04:54 PM
Hm, that was an alright song xD, but every rapper has his bad days. If you want advice, go for more ideas and more flow, it felt choppy for most of the song. (And i'm not a critic, just a rapper that raps for a hobby xD)
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