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Re: A Night of Debauchery and Murder

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XxThundagaxX is not online. XxThundagaxX
Joined: 05 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 6335
12 Dec 2013 06:14 PM
I'm trying to do a murder-mystery, and it's turning out good.


The trees swayed imperiously outside, as the howling winds and dark thunderclouds came in from the west. The mansion was bustling, and full of laughter and debauchery from every which-way. Swift talking up some Japanese twins, Veronica was laughing and ordering another drink from the timid waitress, Azn darted from Royal to Mistress, stealing glances and howdy-hellos, all was right. Veronica stumbled over to Capri in a fine silken dress and slumped over her shoulder, with a quirky, yet friendly smile on her face.

“Ca… Capri sometimes I… have… feeelingss, for y’all… and how about ‘nother drink, hon? Whaddaya say my darlin’?”

Veronica hiccuped, as Capri shrugged her shoulders and said monotonously that her Bubble Tea was good enough for her. The small audience gathering around the two burst into delighted laughter at their undoubtedly cartoonish way of acting. I, the patronmaster snickered and walked along in huge strides seemingly bountiful and jolly, swirling my cane ‘round in a tightly arced circle, the cane as fast as thunder.

The chandelier swayed, after a drunken Azn had thrown his rather large cowboy hat to the top of the room, spinning and gently swaying, to land on the tip of the chandelier with a certain grace to it. Leslie looked up and scoffed at the pure outlandishness of the whole party, people wielding from different lands and prophets of different kingdoms, all to celebrate the King and Queens’ marriage, at the Royal Ball.

Leslie scoffed yet again, for the term “royal” seemed so out-of-place and bizarre to him, what he was witnessing were a bunch of misbehaved children. Mario grabbed Leslie by the cloth-weave of his shoulder and grinned like an idiot.

“Fancy seein’ you here, Les.”

Leslie smiled a deep smile and patted the young boy on the head. Well, not so young anymore, but seeing Olama and Jumbly together as a family, raising this little twerp, he’d always seem young to Leslie.

“I’m only here for the Royal King Nil and The Great Queen Rose. Not these misbehaved sacks of lard.”

Leslie looked left and right, in search for anyone he might offend, found none, then cartoonishly stuck his tongue out at the adolescent, Mario. Mario repeated his action, and skipped away merrily whistling a familiar tune.

I took a deep breath, and exhaled through my nostrils. I then skipped to my right, laughed a jolly laugh and exclaimed to the whole room:

“Bring in the women!”

Women from exotic lands came in through the rear doors, bearing tattoos covering most of their light brown skin, as they performed the dance of their people for the crowd. All was fine, and all was jolly. The crowd had starting singing along to their chants, and clapping and stamping their feet to the beat of the foreign drums.

After hours, and yet-on hours went by, and most of the uncivilized slobs had lie on the floor addled and drunk, Leslie and I had started kicking them awake. Leslie looked up at me with a questioning eye and asked:

“Should we really be kicking awake the royal officials? Does this seem proper to you?”

I snickered, strode over and pat Leslie on the shoulder and said with a bountiful grace:

“I would agree with you in any other situation, my friend, but half of these addled milk-drinkers don’t know their mothers’ teat from a doorknob!”

We both laughed as we got the last one on their feet, and out the door.

“As simple as that” I said with a smirk and a wink of the right eye. Things were great, except we both had some old friends to attend to.


/////////////////////


People mentioned so far:


Thunda
Swift
Veronica
Capri
Leslie
Mario
Olama
Jumbly
Azn
Nil
Rose
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XxThundagaxX is not online. XxThundagaxX
Joined: 05 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 6335
12 Dec 2013 06:22 PM
PART II. Yeah so here's part two, hope you enjoy and have a good evening.



As the last of the Royals had dressed themselves, and said goodbye at the gate, the room grew colder and dimmer. The last remaining members of this Royal Ball were none other than the tightly-knit group of lovers and friends who called themselves “The Circle.” The Circle comprised of I, or ‘Thunda’ for preference, Swift, Veronica, Capri, Leslie, Azn, Nil, and Rose.

We all stood in a circle and faced each other with cheery and ecstatic faces.

I stepped forward and spoke with delight:

“This shall be our, how would you say… our final merrymaking of the night?” I said with a devilish grin on my face.

Veronica fell onto the floor with laughter, and Capri yelped as she fell to her knees, apologizing over and over to those around you.

Veronica looked up at me and laughed again. “Y..Yooouu look like a… like a wizard!” She said in-between laughter and heavy breathing.

Swift eyed her cautiously, and spoke up with flair. “Who let her into the hard-stuff? The bloody stuff is like catnip to her poor self.”

This provided multiple chuckles and snickers from the rest of The Circle, as they had started to pour drink and chat each other up. Leslie stood back against the wall, wearing his infamous black and red sweater, and grey silk-cloth scarf. He observed each one of the fellow Circle members with a slight caution to him, something was up, and Thunda had something else planned for us...

* * *

Leslie pushed his body forward, fixed his scarf, and casually strode over to Thunda while the others were still struggling to get Veronica on her feet.

“Hey, Shiny?”

Thunda instinctively looked over, and then cursed himself for doing so.

“I told you to never call me that, Les, we’re not children anymore.”

Leslie agreed, but the look on his face was just too priceless to objectify to. The wind outside had started piercing the Hall, wind rushing through and blowing the end of the scarf high above Leslie’s head, and then back down as the wind stopped. The oil in the lanterns also flickered, which didn’t help but make Leslie even more on edge.

“Shiny, why did you invite us here? We all know you love to ‘accidentally’ leave out details until the last minute.”

Thunda looked taken aback, and then fixed his tie and looked down at Leslie with a monotone facial expression. The two eyed each other for quite a long time, until Thunda blinked and looked down.

“Looks like I have some explaining to do, Les. I only brought you all here beca-“

The lanterns flickered out, and the wind rush high above our heads, opening all of the Southwest windows with a deafening boom. We heard a large piercing scream, and several warm sloshing sounds, and the scuttling patter of footfalls. All was invisible to the eye, and the whole crowd fluttered in panic, for the whole room had went dark, and an ominous air surrounded The Circle.

“Leslie?”

“What happened?”

“Swift?!”

“I’m here, don’t worry!”

“Stay near me, everyone!”

A light came on to Leslie’s right, and he turned over to it in a lightning-fast movement. It was a young boy who had taken a lantern from the wall and relit it, it was Olama!

Thunda had also powered an oil-rigging system so the lanterns would stay on in situations like this, and with a jab of the can he flicked on the light-switch.

To the whole crowd’s surprise, The Great Queen Rose lay dead on the cold, hard ground. Her neck twitching and oozing blood from its side, and her legs still moved around, as if refusing Death, and trying to step back into the world of the Living.

Screams erupted from the whole Circle, as Olama ran up to Leslie and buried his head into the man’s dark grey scarf. Thunda gathered everyone together, cursing under his breath he looks across the room at Leslie, with an eye of accusation and an eye of disbelief.

Just what in the Nine Divines’ Light had just happened?

Blood oozed from the recently discovered stab wounds in The Great Queen’s gut, which squirted and hissed out a dark red substance. Nil leaned over the frail and lifeless woman, sobbing a deep sob that filled the Hall, the sound less than human, the sound that would forever haunt the dreams of the witnesses that night. Blood covered Nil’s face as he dropped his dead and pale spouse to the ground, and got up to his shaky feet and yelled out in perturbed anger:

“Who… WHO… WHO HAD JUST…? Who just murdered the woman who shall forever be in-betwixt the dreams of a mourning and dead-inside man?”

“PIPE UP YOU BLOODY DOGS! Speak, SPEAK! SPEAK, you PRIMAL APES!”

The whole room stayed in utter silence, and not a word was spoken, nor a sound was heard besides the sobbing of the poor child who had just witnessed a bloody slaughter.


/////////////////////


People mentioned so far:


Thunda
Swift
Veronica
Capri
Leslie
Mario
Olama
Jumbly
Azn
Nil
Rose -X-
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Ultracrash is not online. Ultracrash
Joined: 13 Aug 2010
Total Posts: 11022
12 Dec 2013 06:55 PM
I can't give constructive criticism, so I'm just going to say I like it so far. Ye.
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Veronicafan1 is not online. Veronicafan1
Joined: 19 Oct 2008
Total Posts: 1405
12 Dec 2013 06:57 PM
this is amazing. keep writing *-*
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LeslieVernon is not online. LeslieVernon
Joined: 15 Jul 2012
Total Posts: 10800
12 Dec 2013 07:07 PM
This is awesome.
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capricutie is not online. capricutie
Joined: 15 Jan 2012
Total Posts: 951
12 Dec 2013 07:14 PM
finally got it past the filters eh?

great chappie.
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XxThundagaxX is not online. XxThundagaxX
Joined: 05 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 6335
12 Dec 2013 07:15 PM
You don't know how long it took e-o
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JewishPiglet is not online. JewishPiglet
Joined: 15 Aug 2017
Total Posts: 700
12 Dec 2013 07:16 PM
The filter can be incredibly annoying sometimes
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capricutie is not online. capricutie
Joined: 15 Jan 2012
Total Posts: 951
12 Dec 2013 07:18 PM
i know the filter earlier took out my "hello guys" thread

thERE WERE NO FILTERED WORDS IN IT
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JewishPiglet is not online. JewishPiglet
Joined: 15 Aug 2017
Total Posts: 700
12 Dec 2013 07:20 PM
i cannot comprehend

the stupidity
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XxThundagaxX is not online. XxThundagaxX
Joined: 05 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 6335
12 Dec 2013 08:06 PM
eh it was alright when i handled it carefully.
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swiftattak7 is not online. swiftattak7
Joined: 09 Jul 2011
Total Posts: 8029
13 Dec 2013 02:28 AM
Nice chapter.
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XxThundagaxX is not online. XxThundagaxX
Joined: 05 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 6335
13 Dec 2013 02:26 PM
Thanks ^u^
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katienchip is not online. katienchip
Joined: 01 Jul 2010
Total Posts: 946
13 Dec 2013 02:35 PM
I like this.
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NilPirate is not online. NilPirate
Joined: 31 Jul 2010
Total Posts: 3077
14 Dec 2013 11:52 AM
This is great stuff, bro.
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