Swordize
|
  |
| Joined: 03 Jun 2013 |
| Total Posts: 13136 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:34 AM |
I opened my Journal, labeling the date; 'March 27th, 2020'. He gets his pen and starts writing.
"I knew this day would come. The day when moderators lose control of their powers, seeking the urge to ban whomever they wish. I will begin my treacherous journey, bringing peace onto ROBLOX, killing off moderators one by one, until the users are the only ones who preserve. They may have ban hammers, but I've got swords. guns, and armor."
As I strap my gun behind my back and placing my sword on my utility belt, I head off out the door to begin my journey, heading off to where ever I can, and I will do whatever I need to do to bring peace among us users.
"Hm. I wonder where the wind will take me" I said to myself, "I must find allies, travelling as one, bringing users a right to live."
- Sᴡᴏʀᴅ -- [ twitter.com/Swordize ] |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
Swordize
|
  |
| Joined: 03 Jun 2013 |
| Total Posts: 13136 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:35 AM |
A side note, pilots aren't always good. Also, I need people to add onto the series.
- Sᴡᴏʀᴅ -- [ twitter.com/Swordize ] |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
vladut04
|
  |
| Joined: 02 Oct 2011 |
| Total Posts: 5197 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:36 AM |
| Cool story bro, make more. |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:36 AM |
qqqq I had my own apocalypse story where it was like L4D. I still have it in my scratch book.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSodk10fC3M |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
Swordize
|
  |
| Joined: 03 Jun 2013 |
| Total Posts: 13136 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:37 AM |
I will, but (spoiler) I need users to find on the next Chapter. I NEED NAMES. ;c
- Sᴡᴏʀᴅ -- [ twitter.com/Swordize ] |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:40 AM |
Gordon, James, Karen.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSodk10fC3M |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
vladut04
|
  |
| Joined: 02 Oct 2011 |
| Total Posts: 5197 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:40 AM |
| Make these names: Vlad... Dennis... Alex... :3 |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
vladut04
|
  |
| Joined: 02 Oct 2011 |
| Total Posts: 5197 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:40 AM |
| Vlad, James and Dennis. :3 |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
| |
|
Swordize
|
  |
| Joined: 03 Jun 2013 |
| Total Posts: 13136 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:41 AM |
No.. I mean REAL ROBLOX usernames.
- Sᴡᴏʀᴅ -- [ twitter.com/Swordize ] |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
vladut04
|
  |
| Joined: 02 Oct 2011 |
| Total Posts: 5197 |
|
| |
|
vladut04
|
  |
| Joined: 02 Oct 2011 |
| Total Posts: 5197 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:42 AM |
| Make my accouunt name, vladut04 :3 |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
Swordize
|
  |
| Joined: 03 Jun 2013 |
| Total Posts: 13136 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:42 AM |
k.
I need one more for the next story, any calls?
- Sᴡᴏʀᴅ -- [ twitter.com/Swordize ] |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
| |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:43 AM |
RecoveryManager. And his big red head.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSodk10fC3M |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
vladut04
|
  |
| Joined: 02 Oct 2011 |
| Total Posts: 5197 |
|
| |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:44 AM |
Make some more.
✯I can only spare a few hours to play with you. OK?✯ |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:44 AM |
You see, this is a nice piece of writing!
One problem though. "I opened my Journal, labeling the date; 'March 27th, 2020'. He gets his pen and starts writing." You sort of just... changed points of view all of the sudden. Are you writing, or is he? |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:44 AM |
My name?
✯I can only spare a few hours to play with you. OK?✯ |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
vladut04
|
  |
| Joined: 02 Oct 2011 |
| Total Posts: 5197 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:45 AM |
| S.T.F.U. DIANA, YOU CANT MAKE SOMETHING LIKE MINE OR SWORDSIZES. |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
Swordize
|
  |
| Joined: 03 Jun 2013 |
| Total Posts: 13136 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:46 AM |
Oh, sorry. I didn't see that. xD This is the rough draft though, the final draft will be all chapters put onto one whole thread. Thank you for the complement though.
- Sᴡᴏʀᴅ -- [ twitter.com/Swordize ] |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
Swordize
|
  |
| Joined: 03 Jun 2013 |
| Total Posts: 13136 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:47 AM |
Alright, Pumpkinface.
- Sᴡᴏʀᴅ -- [ twitter.com/Swordize ] |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
vladut04
|
  |
| Joined: 02 Oct 2011 |
| Total Posts: 5197 |
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:48 AM |
| When chapter 2 come out? c: |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:49 AM |
| Meh. It's OK, but has some small errors in it |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|
|
| 21 Jul 2013 08:49 AM |
@vladut04
What are you talking about? Yours was lackluster. There was no build-up. I didn't even sense any story elements.
Swordize's, on the other hand, uses nice vocabulary, proper grammar, and, even though it's only a beginning, has a nice build-up. He uses figurative language. The story sounds unique, and, frankly, quite intriguing. |
|
|
| Report Abuse |
|
|