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Re: Beginner's Guide: Breathing

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Ackeryan is not online. Ackeryan
Joined: 22 Jun 2013
Total Posts: 454
23 Jun 2013 11:35 PM
Welcome to my first issue in the Beginner's Guide to Life. In this tutorial, we will be learning how to breathe.
---
Breathing is useful in several ways. These include the following.

- Breathing allows one to survive.
- Breathing allows carbon dioxide to be produced, which can be turned back into oxygen by plants.
- Not being able to breathe can cause your life reputation to be "nooby".
---
Breathing is a simple, process that if done correctly, can be extremely effective.

1.) Inhale through the nose or mouth. (Either choice has the same result)
2.) Wait one to three seconds.
3.) Exhale through the nose or mouth. (Either choice has the same result)
---
There are a few instances in which you should NOT breathe.

- While you are underwater.
- While you are eating or drinking.
- While you are held hostage by a native tribe who threaten to light you on fire if you breathe in the next ten seconds.
---
I hope this guide was useful to you readers. Expect more guides to be released in the near future.

(c) Ackeryan Publications 2013

DISCLAIMER: Ackeryan or any person(s) involved in the writing of this guide are not responsible for any harm done to oneself through failing to follow the procedures or tips described in this guide properly.
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LordOfFluffy is not online. LordOfFluffy
Joined: 22 Jun 2013
Total Posts: 22
23 Jun 2013 11:35 PM
Lol'd

~ The Horsie Of ATR ~
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goof333 is not online. goof333
Joined: 27 Aug 2008
Total Posts: 16615
23 Jun 2013 11:37 PM
Wait,


I am breathing through my nose as I am eating popcorn currently, its that bad?







Works well.
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peddles4456 is not online. peddles4456
Joined: 10 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 1052
23 Jun 2013 11:38 PM
Alright, I have your first problem. How do I inhale?
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Ackeryan is not online. Ackeryan
Joined: 22 Jun 2013
Total Posts: 454
23 Jun 2013 11:38 PM
Humor was unintentional in this guide, but sometimes the best humor is unintentional humor.

Stay tuned for the Intermediate Guide: Jokes, which is expected to be released in the next millennium.
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peddles4456 is not online. peddles4456
Joined: 10 Jun 2010
Total Posts: 1052
23 Jun 2013 11:38 PM
ist getng panfl

hry
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florence100 is not online. florence100
Joined: 30 Apr 2009
Total Posts: 101
23 Jun 2013 11:39 PM
Thank you very much :)
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Z0rr0w is not online. Z0rr0w
Joined: 06 Jul 2008
Total Posts: 14027
23 Jun 2013 11:39 PM
You also shouldn't breathe when you're in a toxin-infested area without a gas mask.
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Ackeryan is not online. Ackeryan
Joined: 22 Jun 2013
Total Posts: 454
23 Jun 2013 11:39 PM
Swallow air as if you are eating food. If that doesn't work, call 911 for technical support.
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Star34034 is not online. Star34034
Joined: 20 Feb 2012
Total Posts: 3647
23 Jun 2013 11:42 PM
I am crying. This is just... perfect.

~Cuz I'm Batman!~
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lockonstratos is not online. lockonstratos
Joined: 05 Mar 2009
Total Posts: 2328
24 Jun 2013 12:00 AM
you're my hero
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